He is my first ever boyfriend, at first he was the one who is more loving and initiates hugs and kisses; it was all very passionate. He was sweet and caring and compliments me a lot. Fast forward to 7 months now I have been having this feeling on and off wanting to break off with him. At first it seemed like it was because there was lack of intimacy, physical/verbal affection, and presence when he is with me whereas he used to do all that when we started dating. 3 months ago for this reason I started to cry to my friend and even want to break up with him. Perhaps it's just the way he is, and the relationship instead of courtship has gone to a more relaxed settling state. Whenever I think about the passion and love he used to show to me it brings me in tears because I find it really sad he doesn't do them anymore. I need validation and appreciation from my partner. Although he shows his love in other ways such as texting me everyday and makes time to see me, he even changed his behavior more to become more affectionate to me because I told him I missed it when he used to do them.
But lately it is more than that; It has become more apparent that we are totally different people, with different needs and expression of love, different interests, and don't usually agree on much. I feel that I have to initiate physical affection from him and when he sends me home I yearn for the long make out sessions we used to have in the car but now it's just a kiss and a "i'm tired".
He is a really good guy but not the best boyfriend. Maybe it's his way of saying that he is tired of the relationship
Or maybe I'm just over thinking it
But I asked myself; am i really happy in this relationship
There is a strong lingering sense in my gut; a sinking feeling- not butterflies, but a gut feeling that almost brings me to tears...
Has anyone had this before
I really need some advice...
Most Helpful Girl
This is what someone told me after my boyfriend did similar things: There is an infatuation stage, or "honeymoon stage" some call it. First, he is trying to "get you" in the beginning, so he plays up his best qualities (not that he isn't a great guy that doesn't have these qualities, it's just played up more during this stage). After 3 months he might pull back a bit, but is still a bit passionate. By the 6th month he is settling back into his normal self.
This doesn't mean he loves you less, or doesn't want to be with you. Some guys just try to get back into their habits since you two are more exclusive/the relationship has deepened. There is a push - pull in relationships. At first, some women might be unsure so the guy tries to win you over (so you pull, he pushes). After you are comfortable with him, you are pushing (not negative, just women want to feel close with their man) and the man will pull away slightly. This cycle goes on.0