My ex broke up with me 8 months ago. He said he was unhappy in the relationship. We did have things to sort out - who doesn’t? But I believe he broke up with me because he wanted to be with someone he met a couple of months earlier (and started to see immediately after our break up). He took the easy way. I found out about this girl randomly… a cliché, I know.
I confronted him and he said he di not cheat... but it is hard to believe that there was not at least some emotional cheating. I felt so betrayed and hurt. He lied to me, and his behavior made me doubt about the whole relationship. I had no closure from him, and still wonder what really happened. He insisted on being friends, but I refused and went straight to NC, and I did not hear from him ever since. And I even moved to another city, miles away. It was an ugly break up.
A couple of weeks ago he broke NC. Apparently he believes I am back in town. No apologies, no mention of our break up. He is very kind and acts like nothing happened. He only asks me if I want back some stuff I left there. The thing is, we already discussed about this before NC! I clearly told him to keep it and do whatever he wanted with it, even trash it. Weird.
His email really messed me up. I feel much better, but I am not over him yet. And I do not know what to do! Why is he doing this? Is this email an excuse to reconnect? I want to reply, but I don’t want to reply. Replying would most likely hurt (unless he wants to talk and sort things out). But by not replying I would sound bitter... and I hate to show him I am still thinking of him when apparently he is happy with someone else. Replying would also feel awkward, as he probably still sees that girl (but I do not know for sure since I cut all lines of communication long ago).
Most Helpful Guy
Delete the email and move on. He seemed so sure of himself to insist the no contact protocol, it seems silly he's all of a sudden being Prince Charming. And, as you mentioned, all he's done is confuse you and twist your healing emotions around in a nice knot you now have to stress over. That doesn't seem very nice to me.
Listen, I've done that before with someone, and years later I feel like an idiot. I'm only glad that woman had the sense to resist getting back with me, as it was all about me wanting to be in control, which I know now, but didn't seem to mind not worrying about what I had put her through, only to act like I was back and better than ever. Shame on me and shame on him.
Maybe his intentions are good, but it's not worth it to get sucked back into his drama. As you suspected, he seemed to go from being unhappy to in a relationship with a familiar face in quite a hurry. Usually, when we love someone and are breaking up, we need to take some time to process things, but he sure didn't, and now he's wanting to be your buddy again.
I can't tell you what to do, but I would strongly encourage you to stay on the track of getting over him, and if that means not reading his emails and deleting them or not answering his phone calls or text messages, then it's worth it for you in the long run to consider doing just that.0
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