Ok so me and this girl have been best friends for a year but have always been a bit more. We are the same people and have the same values and interests and have something with each other we both agree we have never come close to with anyone else. A couple months ago we started entertainig the idea of being together but didn't want to rush it or do it at the wrong time especially becuase of how young we are and we were also building up trust along the way. We started dating 3 weeks ago and have been soooo happy and have been spending so much great time together and have both just been on top of the world, she said she wants to live together in a few months if all keeps going well and often she fantasizes about our future family. Great chemistry, great sex, very happy. Then tonight we were at her friends house and everyone was drinking but me cus i was going to be driving the two of us home and she was going to spend the night. She said we wernt going to stay long at all becuase she knew i wouldn't be having much fun. So we go for a couple hours and its late and im bored so i ask if we can get going soon and she doesn't want to cus she hasn't seen her friends in a long time. I asked her how much longer and she coudlnt give me an answer so I told her I was going to go then (she was able to stay overnight with her gf's) I asked if she was coming with me and she said not if you're gunna be like this (i was being a bit anxious and rude becuase im in the process of quitting smoking for her) and i said fine you dont wanna hangout with me so im going and i walked out and left. I texted her to make sure we were ok and ask if she was sure she didn't want to come and she said she was done and broke up with me... Im terifed and wish i had just waited it out but also i feel like thats so shitty to just end something over that. essentially i was just leaving her to enjoy a night with her friends but she sees it as me walking out on her. advice pelase, do you think shell come around?
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This is what I see. First you decide to not have a good time, by not drinking for her safety. Which is the responsible/caring thing to do. But is she thankful? Nope she's pissed. Secondly you are quitting smoking, for her. Which is no easy thing to do, otherwise there wouldn't be so many nicotine addicts. But is she understanding of this? Nope, which is ridiculous considering you are doing it for her. Lying about the time that would be spent partying with friends, getting pissed when you are making sacrifices for her, and breaking up with you after only three weeks for no good reason, are not the actions of someone that is in love. Hell, those aren't even the actions of some one who likes or respects another person. Look I've been in your shoes, blinded by love and willing to do anything to make it work. That may seem like a good idea from the inside, but from the outside its very clearly a bad idea. You're going to want to forgive her, I know I sure would if I had the feelings you do. But you've got to say enough is enough otherwise this will be just the beginning. Her actions are those of a selfish, irresponsible, little girl. Which are far different from your caring and responsible actions/values. Don't make the same mistakes that me and so many other guys have made, by putting trust into an idea of a girl instead of seeing her for what she really was. I wish the best of luck to ya mate.1