Jealous of ex and feeling broken?

My ex and I were together for almost two years ago. We've been through a lot. We had a son together that passed away recently. There was a lot of stress for me when he cheated on me, started selling drugs and became verbally abusive towards me when I tried to get him off drugs. He was also an asshole to my son...
It's been a month since we broke up and he's already gotten two girlfriends (he dumped the other last week). I am so jealous that he can move on so easily after all we've been through. I am jealous that he is happy. It's just not fair that he can be over me after what we've been through (please don't comment that I'm a stupid teen to think that my relationship was a fairtytale).
I also feel broken inside. I try to flirt with other guys when they flirt with me but I feel absolutely nothing. I want to get over my ex. I am but I don't know why it's so hard for me to feel anything for guys. I know I'm not ready and I know that it's wrong to force myself to get into a relationship so quickly, but I want to feel happy and loved again.
I've been sad without my ex and my son.
My ex was terrible. He was never there for my son and I. He didn't even love my son. I hate that I miss him. I want to be completely over him. I don't even want to be jealous that he has a new girl. I just want to feel unbroken. Any advice.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Hello. This is a very sad story, and I'm sorry that you have been going through these rough times. Are you really just 16? If so, then my heart really goes out to you. It would be hard for even me at 35 to go through losing a son, and a relationship. I'm not sure I would've been able to handle all of that pain at such a young age.

    That said, the jealousy you're feeling is totally normal. You're feeling tremendous loss in your life, and to you, it seems as though he is not. And let's be honest, he is the one other person in this world that should be identifying with and feeling the same pain as you through all of this. Of course it hurts that it appears he isn't.

    How old is he? How did your son pass away? How old was your son?

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    • My ex is 17 and my son was 5 months when he passed. He had very weak lungs

    • Wow, I am very sorry for your loss. And I would offer this - your ex does not sound like a healthy person, or someone that is able to properly deal with his emotions or life in general. That does not, however, mean that he isn't feeling any pain or remorse or anything like that. Sometimes, people's way of dealing with negative emotions is to try and bury them away or to lash out, etc. It's completely unhealthy and sad, but it happens with people who are not emotionally hardy enough or have a good support system or had a healthy example growing up who usually react like this, I believe. The best you can try to do is just turn to your own support system, family and friends, to help you to concentrate on your own healing. You will never be able to understand him, his behaviors, etc. unfortunately, and so it just cannot be something that you should focus any of the very little emotional energy you possess at this point. He is out of your life. I wish you all the best!

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What Guys Said 2

  • Tbh, you're ex sounds like a complete scumbag and you're better off without him in your life. Also, it's kind of disturbing to me that you sound more upset about your ex dating than losing your son

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  • You have to stop feeling that way. You have to stop

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What Girls Said 1

  • Time Heals. I'm guessing you have heard that before, and it is difficult to believe right now. But I can tell you from experience that it gets better. So hang in there.

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