Ex-boyfriend advice

so I met this guy in my college classes. he is from MD. we started dating in the end of May, but his ex girlfriend was still living with him(he had broken up with her a few weeks prior to mine and his "talking" stage because she cheated on him with his best friend). she moved back to MD and for about a month things were perfect. but I found out in July he had been sleeping with her and it crushed me. I started to break things off with him for good, but I decided to give him one more chance. he never quit communicating with her- she would blow up his phone texting and calling all hours of the day & night every day and if he didn't reply or answer she would call and text my phone trying to talk to him for various reasons. I kept asking him, ordering him even to stop talking to her and he never did. he broke up with me in October a few weeks after he moved back to MD ( he couldn't afford to live here anymore without rent help from his dad back home) and said the reason he did it was because he couldn't return my love, however, the day before he broke up with me his ex texted me being a b**** saying they had slept together the night before & that he had told her he had broken up with me yada yada yada. I asked him last week (he basically totally ignored me for a month, no replies to texts or calls) if he dumped me for her and he said not at all you just weren't my type, you had 2 much attitude but you are really nice and honest but for some reason I don't appreciate it I'm sorry. I did not call him text him or anything for 2 days and friday he texted me saying I really respect your integrity and honesty. I asked him why he sent me that and he said you miss it wen its gone not many people are honest. I said back I told you u would miss me when you got around the unfaithful dishonest girls but I hope you find someone you deserve someone who would treat you right and his reply was so do you but not just girls everyone. and I texted him asking something about him not respecting me and his reply was no I do respect you I just suck at showing it. and the next night we texted each other a few times and I was him so you sure were texting me a lot yesterday are you okay? and he said kinda and when I ask what was wrong his reply was the usual, procrastinating and f'ing things up. when I ask my friends(guys & girls perspectives) they say maybe he broke up with me because he was scared because I felt stronger about him than he did for me, and that maybe he needed time apart or maybe he thought he didn't want to be with me. and they say that from the texts he was sending me that it sounds like he misses me and still has feelings for me and possibly wants me back... can GUYS especially (because it always helps with guys points of view) can you tell me what exactly you think the reason is behind him texting me those things and if you think he has feelings for me? I would greatly appreciate any advice! thank you so much!


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What Guys Said 2

  • At the very least, it take 2-3 months to get over a previous girlfriend/boyfriend. If you enter a relationship before you get over them, it can and usually does have drastic effects on the second relationship. If you keep in contact with a boyfriend/girlfriend after you break up, you get no chance to get over them, as you sustain contact and the feelings stay.

    What I'm saying is that he was always and still is in love with his previous girlfriend. They have probably been sleeping with each other this entire time, not just the times you know of. After the short period after his breakup you were always destined to be a rebound.

    So why is he texting you these things? Well probably in case things don't work out with his "ex" he can count on you for some sex.

    Does he have feelings for you? Nope - they're for his ex.

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  • Look at it this way: He was cheating on you with his ex-gf and cheating on her with you. You are not the type who would like a relationship like that. On the other hand, his ex-gf had no problems with this.

    So, you could say they deserve each other. They do not love each other. They are incapable of love. They both need psychological counselling. Stay away from them.

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