Tell me please, Is this wrong?

My parents divorced about 2 years ago but the fighting was going on since 2009. I replay the day it started every day. My dad, after the divorce, dated but lied to me for a year saying he wasn't but I saw texts and I couldn't believe my dad was trying to replace my mom and I broke down. I finally confronted him about it and he confirmed it and the moment I heard him say that I felt a kind of rage a have never felt before but as well as a infinite amount of sadness. I don't like her, she threatens to break up with my dad about once every two months. I don't like going to places with her and she has told my dad that she wants me to like her. And to be completely honest, I think I would like her if she wasn't dating my dad. I don't feel comfortable with her and my dad. My mom has given up on relationships thank god ( this was her second marriage). I know you might think I'm stupid or something but please help me.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I was honestly going through a similar situation... My parents divorced a year ago and right away my parents got into relationships. My fathers girlfriend lives in another country and almost every weekend he goes to visit her. My mothers boyfriend lives near by but he tries extremely hard to make us like him... The whole situation is overwhelming but I think we have to remember that life isn't going to be like this forever. You can't make yourself like your dad's girlfriend but you can control how you deal with the situation. They may not even last so it's good if you don't create an attachment. Just remember, I know you care for your father, but your his son, not his friend. You can't read his messages or try to be in that part of his love life because it will only cause your pain... Trust me, I once read messages between my mother and her boyfriend and it was extremely uncomfortable! Try not to stress yourself to much, you can only control what you can control. Good luck!

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    • I didn't mean to read his messages, I was using his IPad when he was texting the girl so I also saw the messages

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What Girls Said 2

  • Go easy on yourself; you aren't required to like her, and very few people in your set of circumstances would force themselves to try. You're allowed to feel any way you want to, and others have to respect that. The only one who has to like her is your dad. It would be nice of you to treat her decently, for your father's sake, but you aren't obligated to be overly nice.

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    • I feel like an overprotective dog, whenever I see her I just want to growl at her, my dad seems happy but he says that she wants to spend more of his time with her then me when I split custodians. He (my dad) says that will never happen

    • We are programmed to be protective of our loved ones, regardless of the family dynamic. She can never take your place as your Dad's son--when you look at it in that light, does she seem like a bit less of an interference?

  • it's not stupid.

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    • Some people say I'm being a little too dramatic or something but I always tell them that they have no idea what it's like seeing your parents fighting every f**king day!!! Sorry I got a little mad there

What Guys Said 2

  • as for yerself... if u had 2 choose, then wid which parent among those 2 would u go?

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    • I can't choose, I love them both but I don't like my dad's girlfriend

  • No, I don't think you sound stupid at all. Your sadness and frustration are completely understandable. Your mother is doing the smart thing; your father is making a big mistake by staying with someone who keeps threatening to break up with him. As a general rule, a single parent shouldn't stay with someone who doesn't get along with the kids. That should be a deal-breaker.

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