How to stop obsessing over my recent ex?

We were together for 3 years and just broke up a couple days ago or so. I just cannot stop thinking about what he might be doing, or even worse, who he might be doing. The thought just makes me sick to my stomach and I'm just torturing myself. I know I cannot control him, but when I have these thoughts it makes me want to catch him before he moves on. What thoughts can I have to replace these?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Just because two people Break up doesn't mean they can't and don't Make up and that it's Good-bye, my love forever. And with an "EX" who Still Marks an X in your soft spot here, dear, it's a fresh Break up, you haven't even begun your beguine of licking your war wounds and it's not to say that... he is Missing the kissing as you say you are 'Sick to my stomach and I'm just torturing myself.'
    You both have history, have shared a lot in these '3 years,' so with this being said, I am sure he is Missing what you both had and the things that really meant something to him.
    However, I say it doesn't mean it has to be "Good-bye," because with time, comes motive in mind, and any time, it's the guy who comes back with his tail between his legs and wants you back in his life, but only with a Friends with benefits factor in his own mind.
    If this time would come, it's your choice, your call. It's his way of saying that he doesn't feel comfy with anyone else but yet, with no strings attached, he can have his cake with you and eat it to and have it his way As he... moves on.
    For now, focus on you and let time heal, as they say. And if he does end up getting in touch with you, which I believe he will, give it time... just be careful because with contact, it's hard to 'Move on" from that day forth.
    Good luck. xx
    Good luck. xx

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • There's one answer to this question and it sucks. But it's the only thing that works.
    Time.
    You're going to think about him a lot, cry, get angry and be too depressed to do anything. But it works because that's the only solution. Try to keep yourself busy, join a gym and go out with your friends. Anything to keep your mind off him as much as possible. You'll have good days and bad days, but u just gotta keep on truckin. Eventually he'll be a distant memory. But for now, take it one day at a time and be as strong as possible. Good luck.

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    • I liked this answer. I've really got to stop thinking he's going to jump into some relationship within a week. For one, that's not him, and two, that's just my ridiculous thoughts getting to me. I would like to talk to him soon though... how long should I wait? A week?

    • If he broke up with you, don't contact him at all. If u do, then he knows he can have u back whenever he wants. Not saying that he's like that but regardless you'll look desperate and he'll have the power. Wait for him to contact you. Better yet, don't wait. Start moving on like you'll never see him again. That way if he does decide to call u, he'll see that you've already moved on and he'll panic. The ball will be in your court. And if he doesn't, then just keep moving on. If he calls tell him u thought long and hard about the break up and you've decided it's best (whether u mean it or not). What he says next will show how he really feels. But my motto in dealing with sucky things like this, "always expect the worse. That way you won't be disappointed" start closing the chapter. Life goes on.

What Girls Said 2

  • Same , except mines moved on to his ex the day he left me.

    I'm slowly moving on..
    Keep yourself distracted, go to new places/chill with friends, take up a new hobby & so on. Once you start to feel a bit better test yourself, Go somewhere you & him would go and see how you feel about it.. See if you think about him/get sad/angry and so on while you're there...

    Well thats what i'm doing.

    Good Luck ^^

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  • It just takes time, keep yourself busy

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