My ex recently broke up with me -- for the second time -- 2 weeks ago. We go to the same school, and last year we hit it off great. We dated and it was going smoothly... when summer break came along, he wanted to "call it a break" between us because he was leaving the country for 6 weeks with a special program. It was a very difficult summer for me, and we sturggled with communication a whole lot; I wanted to talk more than he did, and it became an anxiety-ridden mess. When he returned, things were tense between us and we called it off. It was a very difficult and painful breakup; we didn't speak to each other for months despite sharing multiple classes with one another this year.
A couple of months ago, however, we miraculously reconnected. It was a big relief and he expressed that I left a hole in his life, and that "I just fit." We grew closer and closer until we were essentially dating yet again. The time spent was great, but summer break is inching in yet again, and out of nowhere he expressed that he could not commit to maintaining our level of closeness over summer. He'll be a counselor at a sleep-away camp for 2 months, and told me that he can't spend his summer unhappy trying to make me happy. I'm assuming he was alluding to last summer, and expressing his fears of repeating another hard summer. However, he even told me that he wasn't looking to get back with me when summer ends. Now, it feels like I didn't mean something to him... I've tried to convince myself that it's his own commitment issue, but time and time again it always comes back to me feeling like I wasn't special enough for him to commit to. He seemed very shaken up by the conversation and kept telling me that he was sorry, so clearly he felt bad... I just can't help but feel as if I didn't strike him as worth it. That the past few months, where we grew close all over again, didn't touch him the same way it touched me. Does it seem like I meant anything to him?
Most Helpful Girl
Stop basing your own self worth on whether or not you think you matter to him. Him not being able to have a stable relationship with you is not a reflection of whether you were "worth it". You were interested in something that he was not but it doesn't mean you are worthless. You two simply have different wants right now.0