Girls, ex broke up with me and gone no contact for a month?

Here's the background, dated for a year and everything was great and then she totally changed. Started to question the relationship more , wasn't upfront with her emotions and then dumped me and gave no reason why. Come to find out she's not happy with herself and she's got a lot of other stresses in her life that she can't control. She is anxious and nervous for the future with me and can't figure out if I will be the one for her. She is seeing someone for all of this but I just don't know how long I can take this for. I love her but knowing it had nothing to do with me and it's something bigger than the relationship doesn't make me feel any better. I need some advice. Thanks. Steve


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7

Most Helpful Girl

  • So, you two are no contact for a month now, correct? And she did break up with you? If the answer is that yes, those are both correct, then you don't have to "take this for" any longer. She's moved on, in this case by what she says, to seek professional help to deal with her issues. That's what's she's focusing on, and by breaking up and cutting off contact with you, she's not invited you along to be involved in the process. You are experiencing the grief of loss, and so nothing anyone says is going to make you feel any better right now, it's only been a month. You just have to go through the normal process one goes through after being broken up with and losing their relationship. One important thing is that you do not stop your life from moving forward (after you've healed, you don't want to hurt some poor girl (s) making them your rebound) towards living your life to the fullest, which you may decide sometime down the road includes a relationship. You have to let go and that just takes time. Good luck, I wish you the best!

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What Girls Said 6

  • It's hard, Steve, when someone you love and you are in this relationship with, has emotional problems. They can't focus on you nor themselves and it throws a big monkey wrench into things where if they don't get help, they go astray and can't handle anything or anyone.
    She is in the middle of this crisis and with her getting the help she has admitted she needs, it's bringing you down and you are having problems Handling this. It takes a special person to be in this sort of relationship because with someone like this, who is up and down like a yo yo, it surely takes a huge toll on the loved one.
    Move on with your own life and focus on you for now. She is in this for the long haul and may never come back to you or be able to be in a Real Relationship and yes, I agree with you... It's something bigger than the relationship and you may not feel any better for a long time.
    Good luck. xx

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  • She may be anxious if it didn't last, she might of heard something. But I'm sure she was just trying to get some closure

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  • I am literally in the same boat, but he is the one doing all this. He says he needs space to work on himself and feels he can't do that while in a relationship. I think you should respect her need for space. Have you tried contacting her often? If so, I'd stop immediately. You have to make it look like you're okay, even though deep down this is just killing you.

    I live my ex still and am trying desperately to give him his space. Maybe then he'll realize what he's missed.

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  • She gone. She ain't never coming back.

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  • This is a tough situation. She needs to figure herself out and sort out her issues before she can be in a relationship. Unfortunately, you can't tell how long that will take, since everyone heals and works on themselves at different paces. You must decide if you can be patient with this, or if it's too much.

    It wouldn't be wrong of you to try to move on, at least you know it wasn't something you did. I'm sorry for your situation, and hope you can make the right decision for you.

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  • give her time.

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