A text from my ex "it seems like you are having an easy time getting over me..." plus other things?

yesterday, I got an interesting text from my ex... "it seems like you are having an easy time getting over me..."

we broke up 4 weeks ago after dating for a year and a half (we were on a break during June and July) and this has been the longest relationship and most caring relationship for both of us.

I'm not sure what her deal is or why she wrote me that text, but all I responded was saying "it's not as easy as you think."

to be honest I'm not that upset we broke up -- things just weren't working out -- and I'm totally over her.

her, on the other hand just seems to not be able to get over me...i kind of feel bad. while this is the first text that pretty much said it, she has texted/called me a few times since we've broken up.

we aren't together and I'm not sure why she keeps on doing this. I feel bad for her considering, but I'm not sure how to respond to her when she texts/calls me. I felt so bad.

i think this breakup is harder for her (then the break in the summer) is because in the summer she dated some dude which she admitted was a rebound and never gave herself a chance to get over me. now that she is completely single she is hasn't given herself a chance to get over me.

what do I do when she contacts me?

is it obviously she still has feelings for me?

how should I deal with this situation?

thanks.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • She still loves you, that's the only thing to explain it. I have been in her shoes before and let me tell you this, you have to be COMPLETELY honest with her, to help her get over you. When she texts/calls you, you must tell that you love her as a friend ONLY and you must let her know that you are taking the time to get over this relationship and want her to heal to. DO NOT hook up with her, give her false hopes of things happening between you 2, and definatley do not ignore her or stop talking to her. She needs you as a friend most importantly in her life and if you leave her she will feel as if she has failed so don't, be a good friend to her, help her heal. Another important thing is: DON'T DATE ANYONE ELSE IN THE MEANTIME. This will only break her heart, let her grieve, give her time, maybe a year or so and let her find another guy to love before you get another girlfriend. Please, just be nice to her she is hurting and heartbroken, understand that she needs time and just be her friend. Hope this answer helps, you and her.

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 15

  • Ask her what can you do to make things easier for her (if you are truly willing to help her move forward). Be her friend.

    Is there ever a good time to say goodbye? No. So this is way it is sooo hard for some. It's only been weeks. She needs more time. To be completely honest, when I went through what she is currently feeling, it was tough (especially if the girl is the one who was dropped). The way "he" helped me move on, was by telling me that I'm a great person, but I have to do what I need to do to get over this. I will always have a place in his heart but he needs to be honest with himself and stop lying to me about how he isn't happy when he is with me and it is hard to love someone the way they want you too if you can't find that happiness in yourself. That was such an eye opener for me. Because he was right. Find out what works for you? cut her loose completely so it seems like you dont' care anymore(tell her to move on), or you can be her friend and ease her out of the break up(disappear slowly), or lastly tell her to p*ss off... what choice do you have?

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  • it sounds like she's angry and sad about the break up and maybe it's something you did or a couple of things youve done to make her angry. quite frankly, both people have things they need to work on. you ignore. she might. and you just need to not respond so that the conflict doesn't get out of hand

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  • dude, sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. don't lie to her saying it's not easy for you because you're giving her false hope. she'll interpret that to mean you might want to get back together. girls hear what they want to hear sometimes. next time she contacts you, tell her you want to remain friends but for now you both need space.

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  • It sounds like she misses you and there's something you've done that made her see that you were moving on. Which hurts. Saying "it's not as easy as you think" might not have been a good thing to say only because it could give her a sense of false hope that maybe you'll rethink the breakup sometime soon. You should just try to ween her off of you. If she says something along those lines again tell her you don't know how to help her be ok that it's over or something. Basically, be sympathetic (so you don't sound like a jerk) but distant (by reiterating the fact that it's better the way things are now so she starts to let go).

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  • Welll, tell her how you feel. Tell her that your over her and you don't feel the same way anymore. But say that you can still be friends. yeah she still has feelings for you but you shouldnt feel bad, just talk to her about it and try to cheer her up and make her feel better, time will heal her heart and so would a new guy.

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  • Yes she has feelings for you enough to bring the topic of 'getting over me' up. If you don't love her like that anymore and don't want a relationship with her, just be clear even if it's going to break her heart. It's the honest truth. You need to help her move on if you don't want her to have any hope or don't want another chance with her. She'll hate you but she'll be able to know that this is for real and she should stop.

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  • I think it is best to tell her it just didn't work out...and the best way for her to get over you is not to have contact with you. When you stay in contact with someone after a breakup those same old feelings keep hanging on and you don't give yourself a chance to move on...you keep holding on to what was and thinking about what could have been or what might be. Keep your distance, you're not being mean...you're helping her move on. It's the best thing guys ever did to help me move on and get over them.

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  • it's pretty obvious tht she ain't over you jst as yet cz no matter wht you say or never say,she'll still hv a hard time getting over u...try 2 be empathetic and be at level with her...the nxt time she calls,explain wht you feel abt her and if she cnt understand your reasons then you might as well move on..

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  • if she is making comments such as those she was most likely looking for a sweet response. meaning she still has feelings for you.

    if you don't want her contacting you anymore just talk to her calmly and sweet.

    let her know that you are getting over so.

    tell her like it is but be nice about it.

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  • she is obviously not over you. just try to keep your distance from her, hopefully, she will get the point after a while

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  • People can't let go for a long time, she just wants to see if you'd still come back to her or if you still care for her. It's annoying, but we all think that way.

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  • well, do you still have feelings for her?

    and yes, it is obvious she still has feeling for you.

    and the only way to deal with this situation is if you have feelings for her then try to talk with her and try and work things out.

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  • She sounds a little full of herself. As childish as it may seem, breaking up is like a contest. Whoever can move on and be happier first wins. It sounds like she is losing.

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  • Let her down easy.

    Tell her you will still be her friend but that's all & that you will always have her back(if you will)

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  • Do you ever encourage her to contact you?

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What Guys Said 4

  • girls seem to be under the impression that because they can't move on and put it behind them that we can't either. what they fail to understand is that it is part of guys' nature to be more logical and less emotional, and that partly entails being colder and easier to move on.

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  • She probably feels you never had strong feelings for her. At least, not as much as she had for you. Many women always make this mistake.

    Being more emotional than men, they obviously feel more. They also expect us to be like that. But we are trained to focus on other things and it is not easy for us to be emotional.

    So, there is nothing you can do to make her understand. She has to figure it out herself.

    Even though you may not know it now, you can not be sure that there is no future for both of you. So keep in touch. Let her know that things may change in the future.

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  • It's though, but you need to make it clear that you can't get together with her.

    If she's got feelings for you it's her problem. You cannot let this affect your life.

    Go out, party and date all you want. The faster you make it clear that you're over her.

    The faster she can stop focusing on getting you back.

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  • She seems really needy, which isn't your fault. She probably will stop once she gets another boyfriend.

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