Is there anything I can do for closure?

I was dating this guy about a month and a half, nothing exclusive, but we went out a bunch of times and things were going well (I thought). We had talked about hanging out one weekend and he said he would call, but never did. I didn't hear from him at all so a week later I called him but there was no answer. Its been a week now again and I still haven't heard anything. I am starting to think that he must have lost interest and is not going to call back but I don't understand? How can a guy take out a girl a number of times, be the one initiating things most of the time (I did as well but in the beginning it was mostly him) and then just not call, even if it was to say that he is no longer interested. I understand if we only went out 2 times but after 6 or 7? My main question is that I just don't understand and was wondering how I am supposed to find closure in this situation when I thought things were going well? I feel like I should text or message him saying something brief but then again, I kind of already did that by calling last week.

Any advice?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • ive been there..i think a million girls have...from my experience there is no such thing as closure, when most guys break up with a girl they never really tell the truth why theyre leaving her, or why they didn't call back, usually its not to hurt your feelings, or they don't know how to express their feelings or emotions, guys suck at emotions and don't like confrontation, because they don't know how to act or what to say, sometimes they don't even know what they want...so they choose the easy way out and just stop calling, and stop giving you any type of attention. If theyre a jerk theyll say a cheesy line like 'its not you its me' or 'im not ready for a relationship' or 'you deserve someone better'

    its common, its really cruel...and it hurts...because it makes us wonder...like WTF HAPPENED? but all you have to do is realize that this guy is immature, doesn't know how to be a man and do it the right way, honest way, and is definitely not worth another single minute of your time. Once you come to the conclusion how you deserve someone better, someone more MATURER AND MANLIER, who is honorable in how he treats people,then your closure in itself will be you moving on.

    best of luck =)

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What Guys Said 1

  • He was evaluating you and a relationship. Sometimes we guys are a bit slow to do this.

    His lack of communication indicates that he as closed the matter, but doesn't have the courtesy to let you know.

    Here's an idea for closure: write him a letter telling how you feel, all aspects. Then make a ceremony of burning it. Not out of hate, but for closure.

    Ted

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What Girls Said 3

  • I don't think that this guy was very serious. there is not many ways of finding closure but what you should do is move on. find someone new. make sure that you don't contact him. men are sometimes really slow to see if they want to date you and since you weren't dating you only went out he probably didn't want a relationship. so sorry about your loss but you can't say you lost something you never really had. so there shouldnt really be much closure to deal with.

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  • I don't believe there is any such thing as closure.

    Forget this guy and go live your beautiful life.

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  • leave it another week. don't contact him. if you still hear nothing, then to find closure, you have to close the deal. message him and tell him "what you did was immature but I wish him well in life". don't write out a long message regarding the matter. keep it short and sweet. then delete all his contact details and don't look back. that's what I would do anyway.

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