Next step is what?

Not going to write a book about our past relationship, but about 3 weeks ago I decided to finally stop the toxicity my ex was feeding me on and off for two years. He broke up with me two weeks prior before the end of May telling me it was OVER for good. Then proceeded to emotionally play with my feelings going from I love yous to straight ignoring me. Anyways, since he refused to confront me in person because he broke up with me through the phone.. I wrote him a letter put all his things in a bag and left it all in his mailbox and I never looked back. I was done feeling sick all the time, crying over someone like that. Done.
Today morning he texted him telling me he was sorry.
Since then, I have really started to let him go. No more crying. No more suffering. I love the place I'm at now.
So what exactly do I say?
Because I don't even know what he's sorry for.
Do i even respond?

  • Ignore him
    Vote A
  • Ask him "what for?"
    Vote B
  • Reply?
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Guy

  • It's hard to deal with manipulative people because you just don't know the games they are going to play. Personally, I'd say don't bother responding. If he leaves you alone, awesome. If he becomes a stalker, or keeps sending you messages, just let him know that he's the one who broke up with you and no amount of sorrys is going to fix the issues. He told you it was over for good so let him know you're okay with that.

    Someone close to me was in a relationship with a manipulative guy, always being told they dressed too slutty (which they didn't, not even close), not allowed to hang out with friends, not allowed to go out, told they didn't do enough, etc... When she finally had enough and built up a little confidence, he tried to play the "I'm dying" card, then the suicide card. He started following her around till her dad stepped in and told him to stay away.

    You won't gain anything by keeping any form of contact going, so only reply if you need to get through to him that he needs to stay away. Best way to let go is to break ties, take some time to heal and pursue some personal interests until you find the right guy. So have the courage to stick to your guns. There are better guys out there. Unless you need some peace of mind, don't reply... you have nothing to gain at this time.

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    • I told him I accepted his apology and that was it

      Today he messaged me again saying he was thinking about me. That is when I made it clear that it was over for me. It's not that I couldn't be with him but that I did not WANT to. I wished him well and that was that.
      It feels empowering to let go of toxicity.
      So thank you for your message. Very very powerful.

      To any of those who might be reading this. Understand that there IS someone out there who will treat you right. You don't deserve to be disrespected, constantly manipulated or strung along. You deserve so much more.

      So let go of the wrong ones in your life as hard as it is at first.
      Make room for the right ones.
      In time, you'll see the brighter outcome✌🏼️

    • Sounds like you gave him a very classy response. Well done!

      I have another friend going through something similar right now. He broke up with her, threw her out, told her he didn't want to see her face again, and then 5 days later started pulling her back in using guilt and fear. I wish she had some of your courage to let go and move on. I've tried to find the right words to let her know there are better guys out there, but she still doesn't have the full confidence to end it.

      I don't know you, but I'm proud you had the courage to stand up for yourself! No one should feel stuck with someone who knocks them down and flip flops on if they want to be with you or not. To me, love doesn't work that way. I wish you the best!

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 2

  • I would say IGNORE HIM but unfortunately he knows your address so what I will advise is stick to your guns, Annie, tell him there is a new sheriff in town and tell him to get on his high horse and ride off as far away from you as he can And... You are Done and so IS HE.
    I have this One's Number and it Spells: FULL CIRCLE PATTERN.
    Good luck and keep up the good work. xx

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  • cut him out of your life for good and ignore him

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