Guys, Am I just regarded as a friend in the eyes of my ex?

Condensed version of the situation here. My ex pursued me for almost three months before I developed feelings for him and agreed to be his girlfriend. We had our fair share of ups and downs but didn't argue much. He had always told me he had commitment issues but that he knew he wanted to be with me. As I began to move on with my life he told me he wanted to get engaged and he bought a ring but he never used it. We began to argue about this and then all of a sudden after three years of dating he dumped me. At first he gave me the classic "it's not you, it's me" and "we are better as friends". Then after meeting with him he finally told me that I became too possessive and clingy near the end and he felt we just weren't right for each other. However, we had a pregnancy scare during this break up time and he freaked out and we texted and phoned a lot. We agreed that because of this we felt it only right to see if what we could ever work. However, he was persistent that it probably wouldn't work because he isn't ready for a relationship and we should just be friends. I met up with him and we talked and watched a movie and chatted but nothing physical occurred minus an awkward hug goodbye. Then I didn't message him for a few days. We had to attend a wedding which we were both invited to prior to the break up and I was a bridesmaid at it. Him and his friends stared at me a couple of times as I spoke to people throughout the day. When his friends weren't looking he would smile at me and wink like he used to when we were dating. He even came up and spoke to me when they weren't around and he told me that I looked good and then it was just general chit chat. After this we arranged that as we are "trying" we should meet. We went swimming today and I was surprised: he made me laugh, he used some of the lingo we created in our relationship, he still had me as the password on his phone, he told me all his plans for summer, winked at me, commented on my appearance. What's going on


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Most Helpful Guy

  • definetely more than a friend.
    actually this pass thing means a lot. havin yer name (i guess) as his phone-pass means u r hard-2-be-4gotten u know ;)

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    • Thanks. The only thing I worry about it could this just be him having his cake and eating it and this is making him feel better that we can still hang out as friends? He made no attempt of physical contact at all and I wasn't getting a vibe that he was flirting. I texted him after this to say that if we don't have any feeling return then I do not want to be friends with him in the long run and I apologised. He hasn't replied but I do know that he wants to meet up again next week.

    • maybe he was hurt when u said "don't want even friends" and that's y he didn't respond...

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What Guys Said 2

  • Well it's clear, despite what happened he still likes you just the way he did before, but right now maybe he is going through something, he just doesn't want to be with anyone right now (maybe)

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  • He doesn't know what he wants

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