Can you be friends after a breakup? HELP?

a guy and i just broke up after about 6 months of dating, because he said i didn't trust him/was insecure about him living with a woman (who is a stripper) next year and that my life is put together and his is not, and he felt that we were just going to keep fighting, despite only having a rough patch for 3 weeks. it ended badly at first because i gave him space to tell me what he wanted, but he didn't say anything for 5 days even though he knew he didn't want to work things out. i was upset at first, but since i initially started the break up/asked for space first, i decided to own up to it and said:

"i just wanted to let you know that i have no hard feelings for you or our relationship. i relaized that i already knew that there were fundamental things that we couldn't come to an agreement on, despite trying. i should've put a stop to it when i kenw it couldn't work the first time, but ending things are never easy. and it's always sad. i don't blame you or myself for what happened. i'll look back and think of happy memories fondly. i wish you the best and the door is open on my end to be on good terms"

he said: "that's really mature of you. thank you. i've been wanting to apologzie for how things ended but i wasn't sure if you wanted to hear from me. i'm really sorry for how we ended up doing everything over the phone. i was scared of facing the situation and wasn't confident in addressing it. you deserved so much more than that. i really appreciate you and i'm so thankful for this opprotunity you've given me. i will always cherish what we had and know that the best in life is coming for you."

i said: "thank you, i'm glad we're on the same page. talk to you soon" he never responded. is that good or bad?

he also unmatched me on tinder (where we met). i feel some doubts as if maybe the reasons for our breakup weren't too deep to destroy everything. am i wrong?


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • At this point in time, he just wants to go on with his life. He doesn't hate you but at the same time, he doesn't want to be near you or talk. You want to be friends. Ok. Give him time and space to completely get over the relationship. If you see him in a few weeks, just say hi, be friendly, and go on. y'all can be friends but usually not real close ones.

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What Girls Said 1

  • I guess every relationship goes through ups and downs and it's about deciding whether the relationship is worth fighting for or whether the benefits are outweighed by the costs.
    It sounds as though although it ended on good terms there still needs to be that separation and some space. If you want to get back together it might not be too late to fix them as long as the problems that caused you to split have been addressed.

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    • Even if he said he feels that were just going to argue again?

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    • Yeah I agree. I tried to propose that to him and that's why he said he needed time to think which he later said he still feels like it's going to happen again. I was willing to start fresh and move past it but he said breaking up is the better option for the both of us

    • If you think that breaking up is the better option then maybe try to both move on. It sounds as though you have ended on good terms. If you want to work things out, it could be hard and you would need to work on it but it's not impossible.

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