How do I go about splitting up when there are kids in the picture?

I've been with her for 14 years, with two children... one under 5 and the other in their early teens. I'm not happy anymore, and it's been that for a while now. We've talked about our relationship being not so good before, it helps for a few days, then right back to the same ol thing again. I've gotten to the point were I just don't want to be there anymore, but don't want to be away from my kids. I'm just miserable when I'm at home. Any suggestions?


Most Helpful Girl

  • You know, you don't need to be together to raise kids, unfortunately now a days people split up more often than ever BUT there's always advice, I don't have any kids, however my parents did split up when I younger, and perhaps move out, and work out a schedule you don't have to NOT be around her, but you don't have to live with her, you need your own space, having your own space doesn't mean you will spend less time with your kids.

    • Yea I realized that, I wasn't from a split up home, so therefore I really don't know how it would make the kids feel. Saying that, my mother and I did have a conversation when I was about 16 or so about here leaving because she wasn't happy... I told her to go and be happy, I understood. She stayed and has been miserable for a long time. I don't wanna be miserable, but I now can see why she would stay because of the kids... if that makes sense lol

Most Helpful Guy

  • You can't. She's a female so she gets the kids and the house and most of the money


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What Girls Said 3

  • I'm a child of divorce, and while there are lots of things I hate about having divorced parents, I can honestly say that it's a lot easier than having to deal with parents who are constantly arguing and don't want to be together.

    Just get joint custody, you don't have to lose sight of your kids. When I was living with my parents, I spent equal time at both houses.

    • May I ask how old were you when they divorced? How did you react to it?

    • I was 5 when they divorced. I handled it fairly well, I didn't think it was my fault or anything. My little brother was 2 and my older sister was 12. I'd say we all handled it very well, but we liked it better than our parents constantly fighting.

    • Ok thanks, that's one of my biggest fears is how they are honing to handle it.

  • Talking to her, duh.

    • I've tried. It only helps for a few days, then things go back to being crappy

  • What is making u so unhappy in this relationship because it must have been good less than five years ago if u have a child under five

    • Things were ok 5 years ago, not great but ok. He wasn't planned so... It just happened

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