I just saw a woman in her forties talking about how she had a person on here 18-24 telling her to break up with her SO of five years because she didn't want to meet his father. Now the reason she doesn't want to meet his father, she says, is because she feels that her SO doesn't want marriage...(at least not at the moment). She says her best answer came from someone in their 30's who "understands divorce", etc, and that got me thinking and made me consider the fact that maybe younger people break up easier, and it certainly seems like that.
Most people in their teens and twenties are not at all afraid to break up over the littlest and most superficial of things, it seems, as if they don't value relationships or don't respect the brutality of the dating game enough. I don't want to make it sound like I am an exception because I am sure then again there are many people like me in this regard, but I understand the ramifications of dating and relationships and how dangerous this can be. I personally have a lot of respect for the dating game in terms of realizing that it's going to be very difficult and can get pretty ugly. I don't really "respect it" as in LIKE it, but I certainly understand the potency of this, and I am not going for anything special. My goal is just to find a girl that I am physically attracted to and compatible with at a reasonable level, and with whom I can have a stable relationship. I don't have much more in terms of expectations or selectivity. This is all I am happy with, because again, i realize how even someone like that is going to be extremely hard to find.
But a lot of people seem to treat dating as if it's going to be this mindlessly easy thing and eventually no matter what they'll find their special someone and DON'T give enough respect to the brutality of the dating game, and as a result are gutsy to breakup over the slightest issues without attempt for resolution.
1. Do you think this is true?
2. Why or why not?
Most Helpful Girl
1. I've never thought that to be true, that younger people take dating as a mindlessly easy thing. Many of my female friends are guilty of acting pretty entitled with their boyfriends, and in turn will put up with a lot of shit with these guys when it's clear it's going nowhere. Kind of like a balanced give-take in a not so beneficial way.
2. I think 'relationships' like that, where the most significant thing is whether or not the guy picks up the bill, takes her out or compliments her enough is more indicative of maturity levels, or lack thereof, than anything else. With the older crowd (22-23), most of my friends are really good about putting in effort to maintain good relationships. Weathering through any struggles that may pop-up, being supportive to their s/o, etc..
I certainly don't treat it as anything effortless. I know it takes a lot of work and compromise on both sides. When the going gets tough, I always ask myself if I see him worthwhile in the big picture, if I want to stay with him in that respect. Far too many times both of us have had to put our pride aside for the sake of a resolution when we realized it was a petty matter.1
Most Helpful Guy
It comes with age, when your young, you have no idea what you want, so reasoning for break ups can be hillariously shallow in hindsight.
When your older, you make smarter decisions and give it thought, it comes with the maturity/life experiences1