Please help me, I am afraid of relationships because of past bf?

I'm only 18 and I'm young, but I can't help but feel so terrible and just down right afraid of relationships. My last boyfriend emotionally abused me and threatened me, and also tried savaging my relationships with my guy friends. Then when we broke up was when he groveled and tried getting me back, but a few friends of mine who are also guys intervened and made him back off. Then he went back to his previous girfrliend who he said he hated and he liked me much better than and I feel completely lied to.

for a long time i felt like i deserve this and I deserved this betrayal, and like I didn't matter. I'm so scared that i'll grow up and be surrounded by these types of guys and not find a "good one". I've learned a lot from this and I've gained a lot of confidence and what i think i should find in real men, but im scared ill never find one. how can i attract confident men who won't be so caught up in their own insecurities that the only help they can get is to control women?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Don't be afraid to step forward. The past is your lesson, the present is your gift and the future is your motivation. Don't stumble over something behind you, not every guy will be like that and in fact, I believe guys like that to be the minority. The odds of it repeating are very slim.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Like you said, you are 18 get over it move on with your education cause it's the one thing that won't disappoint you. Let the men come to you, and don't be afraid to talk to more than one cause you want to see who will benefit you the best

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What Guys Said 3

  • I can understand. I think it's only normal for you to afraid and it will take time for you to trust people who are around you. Don't worry you will find a real man, yes they are there and if you truly desire from your heart to be with one such man who would be true to you in every sense it will surely happen, it may take some time though.

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  • You just had a bad first relationship, know that others out there are not like that. I'm sorry that it happened to you but there are good guys out there. People of both genders can be assholes in relationships, next time be more aware of the personality type but don't be overly wary. You don't want to ruin a new relationship by comparing them to your ex, you just have to pretend he never existed in that regard.

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  • Put simply, it is not your fault. This guy who abused you isn't worth thinking about. It is important to learn from it and now you can see the warning signs in future. Try and put it behind you. Not every guy out there is like that.

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What Girls Said 0

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