We've been apart for almost a year. I know he's no good for me. He's not on a pedastal I know the horrible things that he did and how he was and all the things that pissed me off in our relationship and why we didn't work. I also know that we could never work he will never change and I'm stronger than I was back then and could never put up with that again.
I went months without him crossing my mind. I am happy in my life everything is finally where I want it. Obviously I feel lonely now and then but for the most part I am happy. But for some reason the last few weeks I keep getting so sad thinking about him it's all I can do to stop myself from crying. I miss him so much. I don't know why I can't forget him. I don't know how to deal with this. I can't forget him. I can't get over him. I just need someone to tll me how to fix this.
Please I need to stop this pain.
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I have a feeling that you never really properly healed. There are stages. It's okay to still have hopes after the break up and it's also okay to be pathetic. Just let it take over you as long as it's needed. Cry it out, be angry, avoid people, do whatever it makes you feel doing. Fuck what others think. I tried doing everything that people suggested, tried being busy and with friends and families and hobbies, it didn't work. For some people it does but not for me. It just made it worse. When I realized that, I was literally locked in my room for months. Okay, not locked but you know what I mean. I accepted the fact that I still love him and I spent months crying, being angry, avoiding friends, etc. And that really helped lol. Eventually I was so sick of me and tired of that bullshit. Finally, I realized I need a huge change in my life and I moved abroad. Yes I needed THAT big of a change. I moved to the other side of the planet and literally started fresh. It wasn't easy getting here, I had to work and study hard to make it happen. One way or another working and studying hard kept me busy from thinking about him, and the ultimate goal (moving abroad) kept me motivated. Once I got here, all by myself, I had no time to think about him. I felt like a new person! There was just too many things to sort out and worry about then some loser from far away. Eventually I totally got over him, without even realizing it. Life MADE me getting over him. And I made in my life, I have an awesome carrier, lots of experience and lots of new friends, while he is still the same loser who didn't do anything with his life. I would NEVER go back to him.
Basically, I'm not saying you have to move away too, but you need to set a goal in your life and go for it. Think about what you want and make it your priority. And also, if your ex is still around and with your friends, then don't hang out with them. I know it's hard but it's maybe for the best. Learn how to enjoy your own company and keep closest friends around, those who care about you will understand.