My girlfriend is moving to the other side of the world, but says I'm the reason she is thinking twice, what do I do?

I am new to this so I will keep this short, Basically she took a new job offer and it meant driving over an hour to get to work and a hour to get back, at the start she was very inthuseiastic and was loving work but as the months have passed she has started to really hate her job as she does not get on with the people there nor does she like the hour drive there and the hour drive back. So this is the 1st of many reasons to her decision. Secondly something happened at home where her dads girlfriend left him and now he is in a state of considering to move somewhere else as well, she is a only child. I forgot to mention that her job she rarely has days off and the hours of work vary so one day she might be working the morning or the night but the hours are more than a 9-5. So with these 2 factors that I can think of brought her to her decision she text me to say that she has sat and thought about her life and she believes that there is nothing for her and she wants to do something with her life, but the reason she is thinking twice about going is me (her partner) But the week she was thinking of all of this we were bickering so we was not on good terms so this has not given her much hope to stay. I told her that I would help her find a new job which she liked the idea of but I got lazy and stopped looking but also said she can move in with me but I also did not do a request before moving in like she asked so I did get lazy and I am trying to work back at it. I just want to know where I stand and what I can do to make her see that if she goes and does not like it, she may have ruined what we have.
Thanks for the responses- update: she said that she just needs to get her head straight and she doesn't feel herself..
Any help?


Most Helpful Girl

  • She says there's nothing for her and she wants to do something with her life - first of all, life is what you make of it. People make the mistake all the time of thinking moving to a new city or new country will solve all their problems, but it doesn't; you just replace current problems with new problems. It's fine that she hates this job and wants a new one. But she shouldn't assume that moving to a new area will be the answer. Another job in this area could be fine. And she can't rely on you to do all the searching for her; she needs to hit the pavement herself. I also think she's upset that you didn't follow through and get the request like you said you would; she may be second-guessing being with you (but maybe not). Just tell her that you love her and support her and will be sad to see her go if she decides to.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Seriously, she's giving up a job and you are gonna half ass on helping her. I would suggest her going since you aren't taking her struggle seriously. If you really want her to stay then put more effort into making it a better situation to stay. Otherwise you are making choices that are going to have a domino effect in the future and the relationship won't end well.


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What Girls Said 1

  • The fact that you got lazy, why did you do that? Do you really want to be with her? If you are half hearted you should let her go, all you can do is have a good talk to her about how you are feeling if you want her to stay, and then the ball is in her court


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