Doomed to be alone?

I know after breakups people tend to worry about being alone forever, but I'm seriously afraid that it'll happen to me. I'm 33 years old and my girlfriend of two years just broke up with me. And, I just can't help but think that it's just not in the cards for me. The older I get, the more it seems like having a family and a wife might not happen. It's an incredibly depressing thought and was wondering how other people felt with this thought.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I feel that way too. My boyfriend broke up with me a year ago. We lived together. I had dreams, I had hopes and I thought he saw a future together - at least this is what he told me. Well, it was a lie. Mire than two years together, I thought I knew him well... I was so wrong. Leaving the details out, the break up was very painful on my side. He's in my thoughts every day. I still cry sometimes, thinking of what he put me through. I don't see myself dating anytime soon. I'm simply not interested. I'm so afraid of opening my heart to someone as I did with him, and of getting hurt again. And I feel time goes by... I'm getting old alone.

    • They say that the best things happened when you least expect them... so let's believe it! Let's live our life and focus on our well being. We need to heal first, how long it might take.

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    • It's kind of hard to believe that right now. I still love her and I wish she would eventually realize she made a mistake. I don't ever think that's going to happen though. The last time we saw each other I said everything I needed to say. I apologized for all the stupid shit I ever did or said. And I told her that I still loved her. But I seriously don't think I'll ever hear from her again. I've always been so good at protecting myself from getting hurt like this. I let my guard down one time and this is what happens. Nothing but pain.

    • I know how it is. Give yourself time.
      I also sometimes I find myself hoping to hear back from my ex, and we broke up a year ago. 😔 But then I think of what he put me through, of how callously he took advantage of me, how quickly he replaced me, and how much I lost in my life because of him... and I feel so sick and angry! How could he threat me like that? How could I believe his words? And then I come back to reality and I realize it's over - it was over long ago. If he ever came back, he should do so much to fix what he broke... I don't think he could do it. It just takes time to rewire my brain and forget about him. It will happen, eventually. And hopefully he will get what he deserves one day.

      I hope things will soon be better for you, with or without her. 🌸

Most Helpful Guy

  • Just be aware that these are self-fulfilling concerns (if not prophecies).

    Man, be cool. Be laid back. Get an online dating profile. Do volunteer work. Have a life as full of bliss as you can make it. The world is full of chicks who would love to get with a guy your age. As you get older you realize how many girls in their early to mid 20s are actually most attracted to guys in their 30s and 40s. Seriously. But you do have to be (relatively) attractive, not just physically, but emotionally and mentally as well.

    So man up my friend. :) With respect. It's your life. Find your love. Good luck. :)

    • Thanks for the advice, man! Once I'm over the breakup, I'll get back in the game. Just sucks thinking about something you lost and worrying that you might not find it again.

    • I hear you. It's the worrying that is your enemy, not loneliness. You'll do great.

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What Girls Said 6

  • I am more than worrying until I think I might not getting married at all since I'm 26 and never had any relationship at all. But some people said that's because I haven't find the right one.

    • This was my first long term relationship. If I can offer any advice, don't continue to wait. I think I should've had more long term relationships by now and maybe it would've helped me not lose this one.

    • Honestly, I don't know what to do besides waiting

    • You have to put yourself out there. As scary as it sounds. Unless you get out and search for what you're looking for, it's probably not going to fall in your lap.

  • There is always hope after ever set back. You just have to be positive and optimistic about it and eventually something will happen and it might surprise you :))

  • You're still very young.
    You have plenty of time to find someone.
    I know you're down on yourself because generally you are the age where people start beginning their families.

    "When one door closes another one opens"
    You need time to get over the heart break.
    When you do, put yourself out there.
    You are bound to find someone else, especially if you have a lot of great qualities to offer.

    Not everything works out the way we plan.
    There are people in their 50's getting divorced... and they have to start all over again.
    If they can do it... so can you!

    You might not start a family at the age you want, but you will eventually.
    Just don't allow yourself to stay down.
    Get back up... and give love another shot.

    • It's going to take some time to heal from this. But, I will eventually get back up and try again. Just worried I won't find someone who had the qualities like my ex. I've been talking to an old ex from college and her husband just decided he wanted a divorce one day. I can't really understand how people can treat someone they once loved like that. I don't think I could ever hurt someone like that. I hope I never do.

  • sorry to hear about what happened!! but i think that next time you will look for a apartner make sure that she's the right one! good luck

    • I thought she was the right one. I wouldn't have spent two years with someone I didn't think was right.

  • Move on, find a girl that is willing to settle with you, and be serious about it. Life rule

    • Not sure I'm cool with the word "settle" but I think that's what I've been trying to do for the last 3 to 4 years. I thought I finally found the one and got dumped after two years.

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    • That was meant to be sarcasm.

    • I know. But try to move on

  • I've felt like that too...


What Guys Said 0

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