How do you let go and move on after a break-up?

It's been like nine months and I'm still having a really hard time letting go. He was my first real love. I was sure that I would marry him but he dumped me because he couldn't take the pressure of planning for both of our careers. He never told me that he was struggling with it so much. I wish I could have found a way to make it easier.

How do you let go of something like that?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Good things come to those who wait...

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    • Any more platitudes you feel like sharing?

    • I say this cause I found myself in your place. I waited 4 years for my first love to come back... and when she did the sparks flew and the love is stronger than it was ever before

    • I'm not sure that your story is a common narrative. Thank you for your support.

Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm currently going through a break up which has only ended about a week ago and I am devastated, so I have no idea how you're bound to be feeling.

    When you say "he couldn't take the pressure of planning for both of our careers", are you talking about in the future for example, how you guys will make it work when you're older in terms of living together and financially supporting one another? I can only assume that's what you mean, sorry if not.

    If this is the case, then maybe he was a little terrified of thinking that far down the line? I'm not sure how old both of you are, but if you're around the same age as me, neither of you two should of had to worry about the future. Sure you could have both seen yourselves together; I seen my ex as my future husband I also thought he could be my SO, but I wasn't ultimately planning for it, because I'm only 20. I was only going to worry about that, the older we both got.

    I'm not sure if anything I am saying is making that much sense. If you're trying to let go then one thing I will say is it seems as though you're feeling at fault for this break up "I wish I could have found a way to make it easier". I think us women end up thinking of all our partners in our life as our potential future husband, it's just drilled into us, especially if it's something we're looking for in the long run.

    My advice to you is to just live in the moment. You don't have to worry about things right now, I'm sure you have years to do that and when the right person comes along for you, he'll be willing to see you as his future wife and figure out, with you, how the pair of you can work together.

    I hope I'm of some help, I tried!

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