she knows i am jealous of that particular ex because he was the one who dumped her in a very rude way, i am always open minded with her , i dont mind any other friend or male but she knows i would have been really hurt and lose my trust for her if she talked to that ex, lately i discovered she met him twice behind my back, she was the one who contacted him after we have been for a year together, the first time she met him, she told me she is at her father's house, and didn't answer my calls all day, the next time she said she is at work and kept checking on me if i am away from her work place or not, later i discovered all that, and asked her to show me their msgs or her whatsapp but she refused and changed the subject, i tried to push myself to forgive her and she said it is over between them and that she won't talk to him anymore, i waited a week then asked her to show me her mobile to make sure she has stopped talking like she said, we were somewhere, and she refused to give me her mobile, i strated crying in the street "please show me", she stood there very shocked and sad but couldnt show me anything, i cried in the street then i walked away took a taxi and went to my dad's home, later she said she knows she was wrong and that she is sorry, i agreed to meet her because i love her, but something inside me has brutally broke, i wasn't comfortable with her , and i couldnt know who she is anymore, just zero trust towards her, i even brought her a present on that date because i felt i was kind cruel when i left her in the street , i brought her a very nice present, but down me i was so so sad and suspicous and doubtful,. well, what do i do? what would you have done guys?
ps : She has left me before for 2-3 months to hook up with a fling , and i took her because i love her, and because she promised that she will never hurt me or do anything to break my trust again
Most Helpful Girl
She is aware that you are not comfortable with her contacting that particular ex. She knows it would hurt you and break the trust you have in her. YET, she does contact him. And, worse, behind your back. And even worse, she is not honest with you about the topic of their conversation. Most likely she is not over her ex, especially because she was the dumpee. If this was not the case, why keeping secrets? This is a selfish behavior, she cares about her well being, no matter if her actions cause you discomfort. She does not seem to respect you and does not value enough the relationship she has with you... She left you already once for someone else. I totally understand why you took her back, I was in your situation once. But once trust is gone, it's gone. And it takes a lot to build it again. Something she does not seem willing to do...
OP, I believe there should not be secrets in a healthy relationship... and mutual trust should be its foundations. I would talk to her to give the relationship a final chance. But if she does not change, I am afraid you are better off without her.2
Most Helpful Guy
I am amazed as how blind so many young people are by the stuff they post here.
If a woman did that to me I would dump her like yesterday's trash. She is not worthy of trust as she only thinks of herself.
Geez... This is not rocket science! lol4