What's the best methods to help after a break up?

Its a rather simple question, what helped you move on after a heartbreak?

It can be anything that you believe helped in a positive way.

Updates:
Thank you all for your input, it was very helpful and definitely enlightening. =]

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Give them all their stuff back straight away or give it to a mutual friend, it is physically and emotionally baggage

    Cut off all contact for a week or two, you need space to get over the person and bring constantly in contact or seeing their facebook/twitter etc will only make things worse

    Take time out to be upset and reflect, after that, take a step forward and don't go back to that phase

    Be with people who make you happy, meet with your friends or spend time with your family

    Continue your daily routine, don't change anything

    Move on from it, maybe be friends when you both feel ready but don't live in the past

    Don't rush to find someone new, let the dust settle and don't look for someone new, just enjoy some single time

    Don't let it affect your future relationships

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Most Helpful Guy

  • There are quite a few opinions on the matter, but for one things to definitely not do is find a fling. A lot of people find an immediate fling after a breakup, but it weighs on the mind too much, and sets you up for a rollercoaster of un-needed emotions.

    As for what you should be doing. I recommend staying busy with friends, or family. Make sure this is done by doing things to which you know your ex will not be involved or anywhere remotely close to. Another is that you shouldn't contact them in any form, don't look their facebook page, nor old pictures, nor reach out to any of their close friends. Finally, I'd always weaken the blow of a breakup by working more, or harder at my current job. Not exactly extending my hours, but improving my conduct, and knowledge at work so I could move up the ladder. Being single is a good time to spend that extra time working to better your career.

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 16

  • Nothing yet. Lol

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    • But as far as my previous relationships... I guess friends and going out. But I was younger back then, had a lot of friends, was living a crazy collage life, so it was easy distracting myself. Now when I am grown and when all those friends and crazy life is gone, I find it very hard to move on...

    • Ahh, sorry to hear, if I come across any good advice, I'll pass it on.

  • Realizing that there are so many people in the world. This guy isn't right for me but there is someone who is right out there.

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  • I think I did everything you are supposed to do and it did not help, at all. I deleted all of his pictures from my phone and computer, I deleted him from every social media (instagram, facebook, you name it), I never, ever contacted him again, never talked to him again, I never see him, never do things we used to do... and still, I can't get over the pain.

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    • Wow, that's very tough but proud of your efforts.

    • Show All
    • *truth, sorry if bad English :)

    • No no, I understand you completely. I feel the same way, I think about her everyday but more of I just hope she's doing alright and happy, etc.

  • This close friend of mine took a year off of college (gap year?) And went to different country

    That said to help.

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  • Going out , distancing your feelings , have fun , meet new people , they faster you try and move on the faster it works I guess

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  • I really have no idea, I'm going through a break up myself. I just try to do stuff that we didn't do together so I won't think about him, bad thing is: we are still friends which is hard on both of us. I still love him...

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  • No contact rule... and focus on money talents and what you love... take advantage of the sad emotions and use that as a motivation to work hard on your pursuits and dreams

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    • Hmm interesting, I'm trying that and it doesn't feel like its enough if that make any sense.

    • I did it after a broken engagement.. trust me... the roaring emotions enables magic

  • Talking through it with close friends and doing things that I enjoy that take my mind off the situation.

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  • Take a break mourn your dead dreams admit there was a loss dont blame instead learn you will love again and you will be loved

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  • Just distract myself, find something to do like working out, talking to new people. It helps me from thinking about the break up.

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  • Meeting new people removing them from my life pictures etc

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  • Going out with friends and occupying myself helped me a lot

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  • venting to my friends helped me tons!

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  • I cry loads , shut myself off from everyone for a few days or until i feel ready to face people. Then i try to focus on my life , i go to the gym or hang out with friends again.

    Going to the gym helps me cope when i feel emotionally drained. I have to motivate myself to go , but after a good workout i always feel in good spirits.

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  • 1. Accept its over
    2. Cry it out, don't repress your emotions, really let the pain in
    3. Build yourself back up by occupying your mind with positivity, like, hanging with family & friends, going to church, watching comedies, working out
    4. Shopping & Makeovers (increase workouts)
    5. Find someone new

    Depending on how strong the bond was with the person, determines how long the process will take. I got over 1 guy in 6mths and another took 1yr

    Also, the finding someone new stage, can also lengthen the process, because if you're a hopeless romantic, like myself, you won't settle for the company of just anyone

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  • Plenty of self help books from Wayne Dyer, meditation, exercise, dating and wine. Time will take care of the rest 🌹

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What Guys Said 8

  • Cut and dry.
    Whatever gets you back to being yourself again.

    I did different things after each break up. Some worked well, some not so well. But time was the ultimate factor and allowing myself to move on.

    Most effective (for me), was to get back to living life. Everything that had nothing to do with her and everything to do with me. I focused on my schoolwork, my friendships, working out regularly, my family
    Going out and doing fun shit. And I didn't communicate with her. Not as some ploy to make her miss me or get her back, but because it hurt too much at first and i needed to focus on living my life and not on what i lost
    I didn't avoid her or ignore her, but I didn't enter into long conversation with her.
    After enough time past I got back to dating other girls. And she and I began talking again. The bad feelings went away pretty quickly

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  • I use a lot of distraction. Go out with friends, other things u enjoy doing, and high energy stuff is good. Most anything will do, u just have to have the focus to make yourself do things when you may not want to.

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  • I bought new clothes, shoes and got a haircut, then started to get back in shape joining a sports club. It was basically what my ex would have wanted me to do all along. I don't think I did it intentionally to get back at her, it just made me feel better, but it may have helped subconsciously.

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  • I know a guy who went to a website and hired a porn star for the night. He got over his ex real fast.

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  • Anything you love doing that makes you forget about your surrounding and people around you would be beneficial for coping up after breakup. You could also start a new hobby or focus on skill development to shift your focus and dedicate your time into it, just to prevent the mind from wandering free and recollecting the bad experience.

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  • Go out and try to have fun. Or do something with someone cause if you are alone all you would be doing is think about the relationship.

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  • Why are you asking this your a good boy Christian you don't do dates.

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  • I just threw away Facebook and focused on myself. Single life has its pros.

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