Can't get over a breakup. How to be confident finding anothersignificant other again?

I was with a foreign girl for 9 month. She studies in the same field as I do. I helped her a lot during her studies, organized a job at a 5 hours/week job at a research institute, where I also had a 5hours job. We spent almost all of our time together. I selpt at her place during the week and she with me at my parents place over the weekend. It was a pretty close and intense relationship. We never had a fight. She broke up because her father would not allow her to be with or to marry a white guy. I always hoped that she would grow up and stand against her dad. To tell him that she grew up here and that she doesn't want to restrict herself on her specific race.
I feel used by her now, because she started a phd at the research institute where I helped her in. I also helped her to take/understand classes.
Originally she said she would go home, also started a phd at home, but then she said thanks for everything I ll work there now. I went abroad. I always wanted to do my phd there / work in an interesting environment, close to home - but I could not imagine to do this with her being there. We broke up one year ago.
I never met a girl who fits to my expectations that well. I am not much into looks, which I could find elsewhere. I could really connect to her on an intellectual level. We had interesting discussions. She -like me - is also interested in what's going on in the world, questions things, wants to do some meaningful work / some contribution to new innovations. She was not into materialistic/superficial things, fashion, celebreties, series. There is just so few girls who are like this. We had a similar mindset. For her it is not an issue to find another intelligent science guy - she can also screw up some more. For me it is difficult/impossible to find another girl like her. That makes me depressed.
I was told to look for flaws and not to idealize her. How to do that?


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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • Can I ask you something?

    • yes you can

    • Show All
    • Well I am going somewhere else

    • I just do not think that I will find anyone who fits that well to me...

What Guys Said 1

  • For a white guy, you sure write shitty.

    • Please elaborate on the relation between skin colour and linguistic skills in English.
      Don't troll around

    • I mean you sound like a foreigner. Well you did. Maybe you were drunk? I was merely voicing skepticism at your story.

    • Yes I am a foreigner. Not all white people speak English as a native language ;)

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