Okay, so I have know a woman I always thought I would marry for about 7 years now and we have done the deed up until about a couple weeks ago. I am admitting what I have done was wrong. About 1 year in she started seeing another guy. I figured with how clingy she was with me I couldn't leave for fear of him being a douche and or her hurting herself. 2 years turned into 3 etc etc. I always thought I just needed to prove that I was worth loving more than the other guy. Frankly though, I could care less what people think of me for what I did. I followed my heart. My question is this... I have been meaning to break the news to him as he only knows of one time... out of the entire time they dated we were doing it. To make matters worse he proposed this month... I feel they should just be left to themselves and have been though enough together, but I also feel like the whole relationship is a lie unless he can swallow that pill. Here for opinions not bashing please
- Do tellVote A
- keep this skeleton in the closet, never tellVote B
Most Helpful Girl
A part of me wants to say , that you should tell him.
But the other side says refrain from doing so.
A) It isn't your place. You have no commitment or obligation to this man. This is something she must tell because it is her relationship.
B) She could easily deny what you are saying , and make you out to be a liar.
She could spin this around on you and say you are being deceptive because you're jealous she didn't leave him for you and that they are getting married.
If he has any trust left for her , he will believe her word , and they both will make you out to be a destructive fool.
I think she owes it to him to tell the truth. That is her responsibility not yours.
Sadly. I don't think she ever will.
I'm glad that you see you were wrong in being a participant in this , even though it took almost a decade to learn that.
Even if she were to be with you , she'd treat you the same way she is treating her husband.
You deserve better.
I hope you find peace with the situation and move on.1
Most Helpful Guy
I say tell him. Don't let him spend money and marry a girl who cheated on him the entire time they were together.
There's a good chance that she'll cheat on him or perhaps spill the beans and admit to what she did. It better that he finds out BEFORE he married her rather than later.0
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