Concerned about an ex boyfriend?

I have tended to have a bad relationship or many bad experiences from one ex boyfriend however since I've semi-healed from physical and emotional abuse, I have become a stronger and of course more emotionless at times to numb any pain. in other words, I've cried all the tears I've cried and I have a cold outlook towards relationships since so many people have let me down.


Through a friend I heard that he's gained a lot of weight, he looks greatly stressed at his job, his girlfriend left him. I'm over this guy but I Guess she was saying all these negative things to tell me I had made the right choice to leave him but I felt it cruel and didn't laugh
I know I shouldn't be concerned because whatever is his business is his business now.

Even though I'm supposed to strongly dislike him, I can't help but feel some empathy towards him. she claimed that he loved me but this doesn't seem so.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Everyone that has suffered any type of emotional or physical abuse in a relationship is entitled to feel this way. But I think it's only fitting that, despite what he did to you, for you to still feel empathetic towards him. Everyone has their day, but still. If it was me, I'd have to search myself and feel anything towards anyone who was less than kind towards me. I've been put through the ringer, and have been burned. In regards to your situation, as well as those of others who have been treated this way, time does heal all wounds.


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  • There was a history between you and him. At another time, you loved and cared for this person and even though it's over, you're empathic because of that history. You know and remember how you felt for him and that will always be a part of you. However, you have moved forward, you have a clearer mind, you're in a healthier place and you know rationally how toxic the relationship was. This doesn't change the fact that when you hear something negative has happened to that person that you won't care just a little. It's part of your empathic nature and that history you shared.

    If you are spiritual, say a prayer for him and allow the universe to help him get re-situated. I would not contact him and open the door again to any communication. You're in a much better place now and you want to keep it that way.


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