So, I had an argument with my ex boyfriend 3.5 months a go. We've been together for almost 4 years (on-off) - we're both on late twenties. In the middle of the heated argument I just asked him to take me home & since that night we never spoke to each other. Later, he shows off & bragging about his recent holiday & his new car to our friends. I went quiet. As he never tries to reach me whatsoever. During this period, I lost my job and pretty much my life hit the rock bottom. I become a total reclusive & avoid contact with friends. So our friends normally updating his status to me because I unfriend & block him in every social media & my phone too. They keep doing it although I told them not to. Earlier this month he sent email to me saying he's sorry & he didn't meant to do such thing in regards to our relationship & says the decision is up to me. He also said there's nothing he can do about it. Which I find a little bit weird because he's the one who said to all of our friends and his family that we no longer together while I just stay quiet. And then he said on email that he feels so guilty about I lost my job & he offers a help but said if I don't need it he won't get in to my way ever again. Again, it's confusing. Until today I haven't replied his email. Because I still upset & angry to be honest. Why after everything that I've been through these past months & about to get better then he sent this confusing email. I thought maybe this is my closure after waiting his response for more than 2 month after he just left without saying anything. I think he's a little bit passive aggressive too though, and still don't know what he wants in life.
What you all think about this & what should I do? Thanks!
Most Helpful Guy
Let me analyze a bit first : I think you misinterpreted his showing off his new car. He was just trying to get your attention, he didn't mean to brag.
The fact that your mutual friends let you know about him, means that he must have talked with them about how matters are with you, he does intend to get back together.
It would be necessary to know who started the fight and how you got into it. If it was you who started it, he really can't do anything to calm you down, he says it's up to you because he can't change your sentiment toward him.
He offered you financial help, because he must have cared about how you felt, if you didn't mean anything to him, he would have never made such a move.
Even though you say he doesn't know what he wants in life, you should reply to his email, but keep it short like : "I don't know what to say, but I wanted to let you know that I got your email and have though about matters between us. I want you to be honest with me now, say what you have to say"
(If this is not helpful, please bear in mind that I'm 10 years younger), that's what I'd do if I were you.0
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Most Helpful Girl
The both of you left each other without saying anything. You can't put the blame on him like this when the both of you staying silent are the reason you haven't been in touch. You could have reached out to him too, right? But you didn't. So you're just as much at fault as he is, don't put all of the blame on him as if you had nothing to do with it.
It's really not confusing at all. He heard about your situation and felt bad. Probably wonders why things ended the way they did. It seems like he cares because he wants to help you. Why don't you reply back?2