I'm sorry, this is long and complicated story.
I'm 22 years old and (ex) boyfriend is 20. We have had very tough times with him lately. He knows I'm a little bit depressed and I cut myself once 3 weeks ago. I told him it was my first and last time I did it. And I'm so sorry. But he got so mad at me. He just left me alone and didn't text or call me anymore, or didn't come to see me. I texted him last week "how are you" and so on... We talked a little bit. But I asked him can I text him some other time too but he ignore that message. I just started to feel so bad again. He has been ignoring me before too... (3 months this summer because we had a fight. That's why I started to feel depressed). Anyway, he didn't answer me for two days even though I saw him online many times in what's app. I told him that ignoring hurts, we should talk or he should tell me what is wrong. All I wanted was his support and attention but I felt like he didn't care anymore... Or love. But no answer. That evening I started to feel terribly bad I texted him I want to kill myself. He texted me back:" Stop being so dramatic, I can't believe what you're even saying. You love getting me mad and confused, I think it's best if we don't talk anymore." That's all. Now I feel myself even more depressed. My life feels so meaningless. I feel like everything is my fault, I know it is and I screw up everything.😔 i'm extremely sensitive person, I feel way too much and too deeply inside me. He meant everything to me...
Most Helpful Guy
If he loved you, then he would have been there for you, through the tough spots, but he wasn't, enjoy the bachelor life and go out for a rebound. If you get any more depressed seek help, id recommend head space, since they aim for 12 to 25 year olds in a chill environment.0THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE
Most Helpful Girl
I'm sorry about what happened to you. None of it is your fault, resulting of something you did wrong or were lacking. It sounds like you've got issues with depression?
In regards to your boyfriend, a lot of people find it hard to be in a relationship with someone who is clinically depressed. That sounds harsh, but it's the truth. He was in no way able to really help you in the long-term. Knowing that you cut yourself 3 weeks ago probably felt like a burden on him. Made him feel like he'd spend most of the relationship walking on egg-shells so as not to lead you to cut or harm yourself in any way again. Or to even threaten him that you don't want to live anymore, throwing around the guilt-trips following what would be an otherwise pretty normal right between a girlfriend and a boyfriend.
You should see a doctor to get on some anti-depressants which will help you deal with a lot of the symptoms. A therapist/counselor wouldn't hurt either, as someone you could talk to and trust with your conversations. It wouldn't be fair to put so much weight and responsibility on someone else, like this guy, who is in no way fit to help and probably already had his plate full with problems of his own.0THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE