He admitted he wasn't over his ex?

Basically me and my boyfriend of 7 months split up a week ago because he admitted he wasn't over his ex and always thought they'd end up back together. (She ended their 3 year long distance relationship by text and refused to talk to him for 2 weeks afterwards!)

This was always in the back of my mind but I never wanted to acknowledge it cos everything other than this was perfect.

A few hours later he text me saying he doesn't know what to do because he feels that he could be ruining things with me and that he feels he could have something more with me. He said he thinks he needs some time to sort his head out and apologized for messing me around.

I text him back saying I understand and that I know none of this was intentional and that although I wish we could have worked out, I hope he figures everything out because I didn't want to leave things on a bad note. That was the last I expected to hear from him for a while. But the next day he text me asking how I was and telling me about his day at work, like he used to.

I replied as normal to which he replied again but I decided not to because he said he wanted space.

Then after not speaking to him for 2 days, I get a text off him about 8pm saying 'wrap up warm if you're out later, its freezing in town x' which I ignored.

Then an hour later I get 7 missed calls from him and then an hour after that he just randomly turns up at my house. I was literally leaving to go out with my friend after moping around the house for days and he does this.

He asked to talk and said that he wants to be with me and that he wants us to get back together and how I am right for him and all his friends like me and hated his ex, telling him to get rid of her. He said I make him happy and he shouldn't let anything get in the way of that.

So he came along out with me and my friend and got absolutely wasted. He was out for drinks after work with his workmates before he had turned up at mine too but seemed okay.

I literally spent all night looking after him and making sure he didn't get himself into trouble. I was supposed to stay at my friends but couldn't because he felt ill so I brought him back with me. He sobered up a lot on the way home and was telling me what a mistake he has made taking me for granted and that he loves me etc.

I thought we were back on and one thing led to another.

When we both woke up the next morning, he obviously had the mother of all hangovers and said there were somethings he couldn't remember from the night before. I was horrified.

He said he remembered some of the stuff he said to me and that he went to say them to me becuase he had spoken to his friends who reassured him that it was the right thing to do if he wanted to be with me.

We went into town for coffee because I wanted to confront him on his actions. told him that it was a cruel thing to do if he didn't intend on getting back with me as he was saying that he wanted to be with me but was unsure about everything cos


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What Guys Said 1

  • Clearly he cares for you and wants to be back with you.

    At the same time, his past issues are not resolved yet. He probably does not have feelings for his ex but has some unresolved issues which need closure. He will forget her over time.

    You have two options:

    1. Take him back if you understand his situation and can handle it.

    2. If not, tell him that you need a cooling off period and both of you should wait till his issues are sorted out.

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