Going through a break up, I'm so lost and empty and it seems as if life has no meaning anymore. Please, share your experiences or give me advice?

Break Up & Divorce

I got dumped a week ago by my long distance girlfriend two months after we met.
She said us meeting again was the only thing keeping her afloat this year. Everything was going fine until school started.

She's enrolling into high school this year. Since she's very indecisive and worried about her future, she's having a really hard time with exams and choosing. We're both artists, so I drew her a lot of supporting drawings of us. To which her only response was ''Thanks.''

She told me we needed to talk and then changed her mind about it many times.

I asked if she was trying to break up with me. ''Well sorta.'' She called me. A nervous ''Heey.'' Is that how you start breaking up? ''Look, it's not that I don't like you anymore. It's just that there's a country inbetween us. And It hurts too much when we part. For how long is it going to go on? Years? I just can't take it. I'm sorry. I'm weak.'' I asked her for how long has she been thinking about this and she said ever since we parted.
I asked her why did she lie to me. She denied that one firmly. ''Did I mean saying I love you, how much I adore you and how I would gladly have a family with you one day? Yes, I meant all of it. From the bottom of my heart. And I would do it all over again. But if you were here with me.'' I asked her why didn't she tell me sooner. She said she was afraid of losing me. That she wanted to stay friends. I told her I needed time to think about it and wrote her a message how I wish her to be happy and all kinds of sappy nonsense because I'm an idiot.

Since then, I can't eat, I hate mornings because I remember she's gone, my migrianes came back, I can't focus on my studies and I just feel empty and lonely.
She was everything I ever needed or wanted. As if I lost my goal in life. Like I will never find anyone like her ever again. I know it's ridiculous, but I thought we were going to make it.

What happened? Did exams trigger it? Did she ever really love me? Or was she too young?

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Going through a break up, I'm so lost and empty and it seems as if life has no meaning anymore. Please, share your experiences or give me advice?
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Most Helpful Girl

  • Your girlfriend is 14. I'm assuming you're not much older than that.
    You both are really young and have your whole lives to find love.
    I know it hurts but trust me those emotions will pass eventually.
    You just need to give yourself time.

    Your ex probably really cared for you and at one time meant all of those things ,
    but long distance isn't for everyone.
    It takes major commitment and dedication.
    That is hard for anyone.
    At times you wish you had your s/o there but you don't. You feel like you have no boyfriend.

    Listen, it's hard for someone 14 to predict the future and say they want babies with you.
    That's fairytale wishing.
    A lot of people start their families in their 20s-30s. That's too much time ahead , given all of the changes you would have gone through its very possible even if you had close distance, even life could have separated you two at one point.
    You both will change so much even in just five years , you have no clue.

    -hugs-i know this hurts. But as I said give yourself time and space.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Your so young; why are you in a serious relationship? You'll find plenty of girls when you have self-confidence and be comfortable with who you are. You are going to find plenty of this type of girl. Talk to a therapist or a counselor if you want about your feelings, but you must get a hold of yourself. She mindf*&ked you. Get rid of anything that reminds you of her. Focus on your career; go work out or run if you must. The way to feel better is to improve yourself and not give up.

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • I don't think it's you, long distance relationships can be very, very hard.
    I'm going to assume she's in the same state (emotionally) as you, considering she didn't tell you sooner.
    I've only ever had one experience of a break up, it wasn't long distance but it lasted over a year, the break up was brutal. I couldn't eat, I lost 9lbs in total in a week, I hardly slept, I was sad every day, it effected my grades at school, I was lonely, everything changed. But then I realised, I can't let this happen to me, its destroying me and my health, so I got up and did my own things. Went out with friends, socialised and met new people, I still wasn't over it but it sure as hell took my mind off the pain.
    Its so hard to go from talking and loving someone every day, to never speaking to them again, it took me a total of 9 months to get over him, worst 9 months, but if id have gone out and done activities and took my mind off things sooner, it would have been less that 9 months.
    She probably did love you, but as I said long distance is hard when there's a country in between you. It's probably for the best.
    Just get up, go see your friends, take up a hobby and do your own thing and you'll be over it in no time!
    Good Luck!!

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What Guys Said 1

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