My girlfriend and I are going through a rough patch and trying to figure out what to do. I'm just curious as to whether taking a break, and coming back to the relationship in a few months would ever work. Do people have the motivation to return to the relationship? Is the relationship happier, generally?
Most Helpful Girl
Taking a break can seem like a good idea, but it depends on a few key factors that you must consider carefully.
1. Why do you think taking a break would help? In other words, why do you need space from your partner?
There are only a few instances I can think of where taking a break might be better than just breaking up. If your partner cheats on you and you need to sort out your feelings, for example, would be one reason.
2. What would the conditions of the break be?
Is this a complete break from the relatinship, or a partial one? Would seeing other people be considered, or just a break from talking to each other? These things need to be made VERY clear if a break is going to happen
3. How long would the break be?
You said a few months in your question, and honestly, that seems like a long time. Unless one of you will be away (like in the military or something), for a good while, any longer than 2 weeks is probably too long.
If you are having issues in your relationship, working them out with your partner is always the best way to go if you want to keep the relationship. Taking a break will put space between you. You will both walk away from your problems instead of facing them. If you aren't able to overcome the challenges of life with your partner, then maybe they aren't the best match for you.2
Most Helpful Guy
My girlfriend and I went on a semi-break that lasted 6 months. I say semi because we still texted everyday and had catch up dates about every other month. We had been together for 3 years at that point and there was a lot of problems throughout that we both needed to sort through. Ironically enough, I asked about it on this site too. After it was over we decided to "start back over" but with better communication this time. So coming from someone who went through it, only do it if you want to be with this girl for the long haul. At your age, I'd be hard pressed to say it would be worth it. Once you get to college that's a whole other animal, especially if you go to different schools (which we did). It worked for me and my girl so people saying it never works out are just being pessimistic. But again, unless you lucked out and found "the one" at 17 then I'd say just try to move on.1