8 months pregnant don't know if I should tell the dad?

My ex and I broke up because he said he wasn't ready to be in a relationship we haven't talked since I'm now 8 months pregnant and don't know how to tell him or if I even should. He now has a girlfriend and seems happy. I don't know what to do any advice? So far I have done everything on my own.
To be clear I did contact him the 2nd month when I found out I asked if I could talk to him and then instantly was blocked from everything. I was told his new girlfriend doesn't want him talking to me. Don't want to step on her toes.
Thank you everyone for the advice I did contact him yesterday and he said he had no idea and wants to be in the babies life. I even let him come to a dr appointment today and I decided to find out the sex and it's a boy!! Now I feel like I really made the right decision telling him! I want my son to have his dad! Thank you all for the amazing advice!


Most Helpful Girl

  • You and him had a relationship before her. She has nothing to do with and I would explain I am. You are not messing with happiness at all but he needs know honey regardless. It was you and him not him and her. Do whats right inform him.

    • That's true I just don't want to ruin his new relationship or anything.

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    • Thanks! It's funny how it works out. He even went with me to my appointment today and I decided to finally find out the sex and it's a little boy so now I really believe I did there right thing even though his girlfriend hates me now haha

    • God works in mysterious ways. Whether or not he wanted to be there after you told him you did what was right. Far as his girlfriend TOO BAD! You and him have a child that deserves both parents and if she's mad because he is being a man that's stupid. YOU GO GIRL WHOOP WHOOP LOL

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What Guys Said 4

  • You should base your decision on what you feel is best for your child. If he is an inconsistent douchebag and a loser then obviously go it alone. If he is likely to be a warm loving dad then for your kid's sake give him a chance to fill that role in your child's life.

    • I think he would be a good dad. I just don't want him to feel like he has to because I got pregnant. It was accidental I was on bc and antibiotics :/

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    • Met with him this morning. He wants to be there for the baby

    • I'm happy for your family!

  • Do you want him to be a part of your child's life? If so, then tell him.

    If not, then don't. You can, in this case, wait until your child grows and then he/she can decide to find him or not.

    I would personally want to know if I had a kid, even though I don't want one.

    So, think about what he would want too I guess.

    • I do but I just don't want him to blame me for ruining his life or my baby to blame me.
      I don't know. I don't want money or anything from him

    • Well, tell him that he doesn't have to be a part of the child's life if he didn't want to, but that you'd like him to.

      As for your child, they would probably be more upset with you if their dad doesn't even know they exist, than if he does know but didn't want a part of their life.

      You also shouldn't lie to your child about these things.

      You probably should have told him from the start, but that can't be changed now.

      The thing is, it is something you both produced, and more than it affecting his life, it has affected yours. So, while your concern for him is legitimate, it probably has to be overlooked considering you want him in the babies life and the baby would want to know their fathers decision. The child can only be mad at you if you didn't give the dad a chance to be a part of his life.

    • Thank you for the great advice. I did try to contact him when I was 2 months pregnant I asked if we could talk and then I was blocked from everything. I'm assuming that was his girlfriend because that doesn't seem like something he would do.

  • I would think telling him would be the moral thing to do here.

    • He said he didn't even want a relationship so I doubt he will want a baby...

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    • That's true; condoms do suck. I don't know man... I'd still tell him. Unless he's a real dirtbag or something.

    • He's a great guy usually always was to me before we broke up

  • Lol women are so dumb...

    • I don't want him to feel forced into anything or ruin his new relationship if he is happy.

What Girls Said 3

  • That baby is his (I assume) and therefore it's his responsibility. You should've told him you were pregnant from the beginning. The baby deserves a father.

    • It's for sure his no other option.
      But I don't know if ruining his current relationship and forcing him into this would be the right thing from what I heard his new girlfriend won't wven let him talk to other girls.

  • U must talk him

  • I would just tell him and say he can be as involved as he wants (or whatever you prefer). But he has the right to know he has a child out there.

    • Good point. Thank you.

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    • Hahaha will do! Thanks. :) And congrats, by the way!

    • Thank you very much! ☺️

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