Been with girlfriend 3 years , just came back from Greek holiday and within a week of getting home she ended it , wants to be friends?

We get on great, and saw each other every evening also pass each other at work , I'd say thinking back we probably spent too much time together and not enough time doing other things with friends, first of all I asked why etc to splitting up , she said we get on really well but we are more like friends now , she loves spending time with me but doesn't feel there's anything else there anymore , I didn't beg etc to get her back , I messaged now n then to try and make conversation n got replies but just sort of yes and no stuff , then I decided to stop contact , I left her alone for 12 days then at work she started talking to me , then week later few staff go to pub after work so she asked me to go for a drink with them all , so I did , had 2 then we both left to pick our kids up from play group , we ain't got kids together there from past relationships.. few days later I asked her if she fancied a coffe after work , she said yes , so we went n chatted n both enjoyed it n said goodbye , did same day after , day after that I gave her a lift home after work and had a few coffee and said goodbye , I texted to say I had a good time , she said me too I want us to be friends. Problem is I still love her and she knows this , it feels like she realised I'd stopped contacting her and was getting over her then she decided to test me , now 2 days later, she's gone back to yes n no texts and doesn't even try to make conversation , it's like the few drinks n chatting never happened.. I've decided to stop contact , if she says hi I will but I was breaking my neck to say hi at work etc before , also I've deactivated my Facebook as we have a lot of work friends mutual so blocking won't help as il see stuff she's not tagged in but still has photos etc , this is to give myself time to breath... feels like I was moving on and she's put me back to almost square one.. a few work friends also said it looked like she wanted you back and when she realised she could get you lost interst , we work in a office
Already doing the gym stuff , n looking and feeling better too but wish I'd not av gone for drinks as at first I said no n she looked shocked then she said come on!!! N I gave in straight away , I do feel almost like I was tested to see if I'd given up , live n learn i hope
Feel abit guilty about deactivating Facebook as we got a lot of joint photos on. Holiday. Nights out etc.. But I've done it so I can't see things and get hurt anymore.. not sure if that's a selfish attitude or not


Most Helpful Girl

  • Sounds like she likes you but that attraction is gone. Take break from her for a bit and go on some dates, get down the gym etc. As soon as she see's you getting attention fom other women she'll see you as more of a challenge and you'll go up in how she percieves you.

    • I agree. so I've totaly backed off, n deactivated my Facebook I don't want to see all the crap her mates put either , it might annoy her as we got a lot of photos together I've put on but that's how Im guna deal with it for now. guna just try n stay clear of her n if i pass at work il just say hi, give her same as she gives me, she's moving jobs in 6 months so that will help

Most Helpful Guy

  • Working out and focusing on you is good 2 more things you need to do. You don't have to ignore her, but mirror how she is acting. If she's not attempting to start or even continue a conversation then you need to do the same with her. Don't go out of your way for her.
    Second, even if you don't feel like it you need to go out with other women. To get you back in the swing of things and to realize that women still find you appealing. Don't do this to make your ex jealous. Do this for you. She doesn't need to know you're going out with other women and honestly she doesn't have a right to know.
    Feel free to not answer all of her texts.

    • Right now it sounds like she likes your attention attention the feeling of having you be in love with her still.
      You have to deny her that to attention certain extent.

    • Good advise, probs better to mirror than totaly ignore, see what tomorrow brings at work

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What Guys Said 1

  • Tell her the truth. Tell her that you need space and time to heal; if she respects you as a person, she'll give you that time and space. Tell her to not talk to you unless it's work related until you have healed. Honestly, you need to move on and forget her and focus on you.


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