What would you think of this email from your ex?

Everyone is telling me not to acknowledge my ex bf's birthday. We broke up seven months ago, (I did the breaking up but only because he became distant and I thought that's what he wanted) and I've done a few small things to contact him since, but he's done nothing to talk to me and I don't know why because he was the one to say "we can still be friends". I just miss him so much and can't let him go... am I being stupid wanting to send this?

"I hope all good things come your way this year, and I want you to know I still care about you - always will - and hope you're doing well. :)"

Should I send this? Please explain why or why not.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • i wish my ex would send me this, but then again, she's a bitch (i got dumped)

    Maybe he hasn't contacted you for 2 major reasons:
    -male ego, since you dumped him he may think you should be the one contacting him since you were the one putting him out of your life.
    -he just didn't care and doesn't care about you or being in your life.

    you can get to a conclusion because you were the one in the relationship and know how the breakup was, and how he reacted or whatever.

    but in which case, that email seems too emotional, i think you should put only this:
    "I hope all good things come your way this year :) hope you are doing well" ..
    thats a little bit more casual.
    BUT if you want him back just talk to him lol I don't know, do something if you think you have a chance or he doesn't have a new girlfriend.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Are you trying to get back with him? If so, then send it. But if not, I wouldn't. Sounds to me like he was hurt by the break up.

    I know if it was me, I would prefer not to hear from my ex. But every situation is different.

    My ex boyfriend and I had to live with each other after the break up. It was both challenging and frustrating at times, but we made it through. I moved out finally and we still talk from time to time, We worked really hard to have the living situation work as we were locked in a lease. We changed our relationship from boyfriend and girlfriend, to ex's to friends.

    We are on pretty good terms now. I would probably wish my ex a happy birthday. But the other ex's I have I ignore.

    It's hard to go from being in a relationship to being ex's and then immediately be friends. You have to put work in. If you two haven't really contacted one another, then it's probably not a good idea to keep trying.

    Sounds to me like he just wants some space. Especially if he hasn't responded to you at all.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 9

  • In your position, I won't bother to recognise his birthday or send him that email. You broke up with him for the right reason. After the breakup, he hasn't acknowledged any of your correspondence.

    Girl, he has activated a potent weapon called silence mode, used to reduce your social value. And it seems to be working, as evidenced by your desire to acknowledge his birthday.

    If by sending the email or acknowledging his birthday is shrouded with the intention to win him back, please don't and don't do it. Your friends are 100% correct. Have you ever heard about this phrase: "People Pay Attention To What Matters To Them"?

    You are paying attention to his birthday because he matters to you. The question is, do you matter to him? There lies the problem, girl.

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  • How does this help you to move on? How might this hinder you in your efforts to move forward?

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  • Don't send it for one simple reason. This will be hard to hear for you but he doesn't give a fuck about you apparently.
    If he did he would not be so distant all the time and he would fight for you more. If he doesn't show effort then that means he stopped caring.
    So I say FUCK him... forget him.

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  • i bet he never going to reply you so trust me don't send it.. here a girl is also post something like this. but her boyfriend didn't reply and you know what me and my girlfirned having huge fight then we broke up and her birthday is on December but i am not going to send her any reply s fuck of her life she waste my time evern doing doing so much for her really FUCK OFF HER LIFE

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  • dont do it , maybe by then you met a new guy, 10 x times as awesome as he is.

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  • I wouldn't be that sentimental, most guys don't like that. Send something funny if you truly feel like it, make him laugh and positively remember you. Then go on with your life, make him think and wonder.

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  • Yeah, it's totally clingy. Send him something fun instead.

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  • I didn't read it.

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  • Send it. Most guys are lacking in three romance department. My guess is either he got too comfortable and got distant or he just didn't know how to express his affection. Explain yourself to him if he contacts you and see what happens.

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What Girls Said 5

  • If you really want to send that, go ahead and send it.
    Now if what you really want is to see if you can get together again, you can ask him to have a talk.
    Bare in mind that from all this you could learn that he's no longer interested, but if you're willing to take the risk, and I don't see why not, go ahead and do what you feel. It's going to hurt if he doesn't want to get back together but at least you will have tried.

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  • I think you made a mistake in breaking up with him. It sounds like you really care for your ex and you should have made sure that was what he wanted and just talked to him about his distance. Although you may have broken up with him for another reason because if you really wanted him you wouldn't have let his distance keep you from trying harder in the relationship to see what the issue is, so I would say you should ask yourself do you want to get back together with this guy and if so I would send something a little different that gears towards that otherwise if not then what you wrote is good except I think it would just torment him if he didn't want to break up. No communication helps the heart heal better then continue to talk to him.

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  • No. What would be the purpose? Better to do no contact

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  • Dont send it like that, especially the "I still care about you" part, it's lame because the romance is over and 7 months is a lot.

    Id prefer you say something like : "I wish you a happy birthday and I hope all good things come your way this year"

    Brief and nice.

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  • You dumped him and you are still contacting him? May I ask why are you still contacting him after you broke up 7 months sago? And just because he said you can remain friends does not mean he meant it, he was just saving face and trying to not look angry or upset. He's moving on. He does not want to talk to you. This is going to soung harsh but it's been 7 months and he's not talking to you or making any effort then you need to take the hint and move on

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