I've never gone after an ex, but I have to try with her. I feel like she didn't want to break up with me, it's just the circumstances. We're both in college, I'm a sophomore and she's a freshman. I think the stress of adjusting, and her never having taken dating seriously influenced her choice. Plus she's doing a complete 180 from her parents. They're very religious, she's an atheist, but they don't know that. I think that because of the disconnect in her home life, she never learned to talk about problems. I'm patient, and I can wait for her to open up. If she had told me I was being clingy, I would have backed off. I'm really good about things like that, I just need to be told. After things have settled in say, a month, I'm going to see if she'd give us another shot. She's taking this hard, because she's never had a partner care about her, so she's not sure what to do. We were good together, and if given another opportunity, I really believe that we'd make it work.
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I used to think like you... And I can't judge you for trying though in my gut I see red flags a waiving.
Communication is the #1 most important thing in a relationship right next to trust, even above love.
The fact that she calls you "clingy" when all you doing is expressing your honest feelings for her? Doesn't sound like it allows you to be true to yourself or to express yourself freely... How you say it's as if though she wants you to be cruel to her, dude... She sounds a bit mixed up in the head. Throughout your post I'm hearing rationalization as to why you think she's going through these issues... I'm just going to tell you straight up, it's apparent that you care for her, but it's you that are making excuses for her behavior... Not her.
For my experience I have noted some women are not very direct and don't want to hurt your feelings anymore than they have to... But if she wanted to be with you dude, she would.
All that I'm saying is you need to be with someone who can accept you for who you are, and not push you away for being more than what they want you to be.
Like I said in the beginning... I cannot blame you for wanting to at least give it a try, my advice would be to keep yourself guarded... Like, give her her space... the try not to delusion yourself into thinking you can help her change herself... And god damn it don't let her change who you are, you sound like a good guy... Trust when I say, whatever she's going through doesn't have anything to do with you... And there is a possibility you're going to get tangled up in this if you emphasize too much with a problem that is not yours... And let her tell you that you are not worthy because you care about her.
I'm sorry man, that just sounds like complete crap to me... If a woman cannot love you in the same way that you love her... No matter how much it hurts, you have to let her go.