Happiness, is it possible to get back to being happy in a relationship? Can you be in love and unhappy?

If your partner says they are not happy or maybe you told them you weren't happy, did you stay and try to make it work? Was it worth the effort? My first time feeling this immense pressure and anxiety about losing the one I love, it really is a crippling feeling.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • What is the unhappiness about?

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    • She couldn't answer that question completely, we do have some communication issues, but we've both worked extremely hard to correct them. She mentioned sex wasn't the same, but hell, I think the passion can come and go. Right? She seems happy the majority of the time, but maybe she is questioning if we are right for each other long term.

    • If she can't answer that question clearly, then you should give her some space for her to figure out why she is unhappy. Sex issues can be remedied, yes, but it's impossible to figure out why you might not be right for each other long term if she can't tell why she's unhappy. Relationships are about weighing the positive and the negative. No one is perfect and everything will never be completely perfect. Figuring out what big issues might be holding you back are important.

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What Girls Said 2

  • not happy in a relationship, doesn't just yet mean its a break up, why dont you go over and do stuff that made you two get together in the first place when you just met? im pretty sure back then you two were happy

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    • I've tried, some days I feel like she is happy, you can just see it in her eyes and her expressions. But on other days, it's like a blank canvas, almost nothing. We have more good days than bad, and I've pointed this out to her. Maybe she just thinks she'll find someone that'll make her smile all the time, I just don't think that is realistic.

  • First I need to ask you, how long have you been together?

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    • About 18 months, we've lived together for about 10 months.

    • Have you tried taking some time apart? Sometimes space is good, it helps clear your mind, any distractions are gone while you can really feel what you want and where you want to be. And when you are ready to come back, you are ready to really talk open and lay everything out on the table.

What Guys Said 7

  • Yes, it's possible to be in love and yet be unhappy, I think in your case your relationship has just lost some spark and now things are a bit boring, but then being unhappy doesn't mean that your partner doesn't love you anymore.

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  • The only thing that hurts more than being in a one-sided relationship is having that other person break up with you.

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    • Yes sir, it's crushing. I've lost just about all motivation to do anything. I haven't given up on us, but it's disheartening when I feel like it's for nothing.

  • All couples go through rough patches of doubt or unhappiness, it's natural what you do when these things occur though is what makes or breaks your relationship. And believe me I know the feeling but you also have to know that it;s not to late to fix things if you really want to.

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  • Plain and simple, I think she's bored. When I was with my girlfriend, she was perfect to the point of complete obedience. I hated that. She was just a branch of me, with no personality of her own. I cared about her, but I knew I didn't love her. My advice is to never play all of your cards, because once you're spent, the spark is gone. When you beat the game, sometimes it get boring. I read your comments... you really care about them. Hope it all works out

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    • Man, that's pretty deep for a young man. I appreciate the input. I have to admit, you might be right.

    • I appreciate your appreciation :)

  • She's lost attraction to you, plain and simple.

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  • If you aren't happy I doubt you are feeling love.

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  • Happiness and all this shit is for the movies. Relationships are feminist arrangements

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