Any advice with what I should do?

there was a girl used to talk to me every day either through text or in person. So i asked her out during the summer while i was studying for the MCAT. The test was of extreme importance to me. During this time I felt I became more and more obsessed with the test, and began to emotionally distance myself, because i felt that if I really cared for her it would impact my ability to study (because i would be thinking of her instead of studying). So we went on dates and I treated her poorly, and eventually she stopped texting me. After the summer I wrote the test, and now I keep seeing her EVERYWHERE, and i can't help but wonder what we could of had. But every time I text her she seems rather indifferent, and keeps saying "Apparently". I told her i was sorry for how I treated her and asked if I could take her on another date. She said she understands why i treated her that way, then said she isn't looking for anything right now.

Next the other day I was walking behind her, and I think she realized this and made a B-line for some other way to her destination. We also park in the same parking lot and she will wait for me to leave the parking lot before leaving her car. I also saw her at a local grocery store, but was ashamed of how i treated her so I walked away, but looked behind me and saw her friend staring at me. These actions make me feel super uncomfortable.

What should I do? I feel like if i talk to her in person, and she gets to know me again she will remember who i was, but on the other hand I am wondering if I should just drop the friendship I had with her and just move on.

  • she is uncomfortable around me, or has moved on.
    Vote A
  • she has feelings for me
    Vote B
  • she hates me because of the way I treated her
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Girl

  • "I told her i was sorry for how I treated her and asked if I could take her on another date. She said she understands why i treated her that way, then said she isn't looking for anything right now."

    You pretty much answered your own question. You apologized already and asked for a second chance, she basically said no.

    I know you feel bad but spending your time dwelling and begging for forgiveness after you've already apologized is no way to spend your last year of college, or whatever year you are

    I wouldn't say drop her but don't spend weeks and months on this same thing, you apologized- let it go
    Continue to be friendly
    If she matures and wants to return things to the way they were you'll know

    Basically, don't kiss ass or beg.. So many people do this after being shut down countless times thinking it'll change something even if it did is this really how it's going to be every time you to have falling out, you have to apologize and apologize while this person clearly avoids you or has girl talk with her friends about how she's still angry or upset

    Let her get over it in her own time

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    • I won't beg her, it's just weird how she just keeps avoiding me everywhere. A normal person who doesn't care about someone would just not care about that person being in their presence, but it feels like she has extreme discomfort around me. Almost as though she is afraid of me!

    • I usually feel uncomfortable around people after certain situations.. I wouldn't say I avoid them but I keep my distance
      I also have bad anxiety too

      I can't explain why people obviously avoid people
      It only happen to me once, I honestly still spoke to him when he was obviously avoiding me and after a while he approached me and pursued to resume on normal terms there wasn't a conversation. He just started treating me normal again.. No tension or anything just laughs
      For that reason I just say let it take care of itself you've did you deed already

      On the other hand I've heard of people doing things like this for attention, or because they want you to chase them.
      I don't have the patience for games at my age, so I don't even bother in those situations

    • She could just have anxiety

Most Helpful Guy

  • "During this time I felt I became more and more obsessed with the test, and began to emotionally distance myself, because i felt that if I really cared for her it would impact my ability to study "

    ^personally i believe u did well and u shouldn't have any regrets... if dis test was essential for yer studies then she should understand...

    "After the summer I wrote the test, and now I keep seeing her EVERYWHERE, and i can't help but wonder what we could of had. But every time I talk to her she seems rather indifferent, and keeps saying "Apparently". "

    ^if u haven't done it yet... then u should xplain to her y u were distant...

    " told her i was sorry for how I treated her and asked if I could take her on another date, and she said no. What should I do? I feel like if i talk to her in person, and she gets to know me again she will remember who i was, but on the other hand I am wondering if I should just drop the friendship I had with her and just move on."

    ^well... if u see she doesn't change even after u xplained da situation to her... just move on... it'd be better i believe...

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What Girls Said 1

  • I would assume she is uncomfortable that you treated her that way (not exactly hate you, hate you). I guess when you see her, you can walk up to her and tell her "I feel really awful for treating you that way and I have to make it up to you. Go on a date with me again. Can we start fresh? All over again?"

    If she is ok with it, you guys are cool, if she declines, she's moved on. And if she moves on, so should you. But you have a chance to redo things and make things right again.

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