Whats the chances of my babys dad coming back after split? has this happened to anyone how long did it take?

Weve been split a couple of months due to him changing and going out a lot. I went to my parents for a week to give us both space he was crying to his mum he missed us amd hated the house without us he told me we was his world and that he would spend more time as a family. He was great for a week then went bk to his old ways so i asked him to leave thinking it would give him a wake up call. We argued couple times he said he didn't want to come back as he felt we couldnt move on after what had happened yet he keeps going hot and cold. 1 week were fine he's laughing and joking with me trying to start a play fight using our childs toys especially if im sat on my phone spending time together as a family when its his turn to have our child the next he's arguing and throwing me kicking him out in my face. He tried to make out he was seeing someone when all it was was someone to have sex with he goes out drinking a lot and sleeps all day before work and always looks miserable and lost. He blocked me on fb after a row yet always shows me stuff when he's round. Is he just seeing if the grass is greener and then will realise what he's lost? Or will he just stay as we are? I can't move on cuz whenever i start to something happens and im all over the place again. Im suffering from really bad depression which I've had on and off for 10yrs so thats not helping either. Anyone else been through the same and they came back? He wasn't a bad parent or boyfriend he was loving and caring then just woke up different he's dealt with a lot in his past too and i think having a baby may have bought back some old demons


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  • I haven't been through the exact same thing but I do have a toddler and when I had the baby our relationship got really shitty. Just know that you're not alone, and good luck. Guys really like to get flaky once you've got a baby. Try to hang in there, and do what's best for you and your baby. It sounds like he's back and forth and probably needs some time to kind of get used to things or maybe grow up. My boyfriend would be nice one day then would be ignoring me and drinking the next, hating me. then I would hate him for never helping with the baby and making my depression way worse. Babies can change guys and sometimes it isn't for the better. Do you love him? Do you think you two are better off apart for a while?

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    • Thanks for the reply. I still love him which makes it worse. The way he acts sometimes i think he wants to come back but is worried then other times i think he won't come back at all. We was in town and he was joking about with me then he saw someone from his work and suddenly changed like he didn't want them to see he was having a laugh with me. If i go out while he has our baby he asks where im going all the time and who with. I just wish i knew what was going on in his mind. Did u two split? Or manage to ride it out? I just keep thinking if i hadn't told him to leave maybe hed still be here and we could of worked through it

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    • We had a chat like that 2 weeks after we split as i was fed up of not getting an answer i accepted it but now i feel like im getting mixed signals again but i dont want to ask him to then be rejected again. I wrote a message to him this morning as im not well and exhausted and need him to look after our baby for the night as he doesn't have him more than 3hrs a day maybe 2/3 times a week but he can't have him where he's staying so it would have to be here but i dont want him thinking i can't cope or im doing it to get him back as im not i just need sleep and him to do his share after all it took 2 to make the baby so 2 should do fair share of bringing him up. But i deleted the text and didn't send it.

      Glad its getting better for you. I was the same i used to love my job and socialising now im luckily to get the time and if i do my ex always has a time limit on it so he can go home or go out like he's stopping me having a life which if he wants me to move on he needs to stop doing.

    • doesn't help that some people say he's moved on and others say he will come back either makes my head even worse

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