Is it possible to be just friends with an ex that you're still in love with?

My ex boyfriend and I broke up a month ago. The relationship was on & off because we have both equally hurt each other in some way in the past but would always find a way to make up. But it wasn't always bad we shared plenty of good times also. The last break up ended on bad terms and caused us to not speak to each other for a few months afterwards. It left me completely heartbroken, depressed & anxious and I thought I'd never move on. Until one day I finally contacted him. I called and started asking how he's been then he said he wants to meet up right now & I said yes. While we were together we talked about all the new things going on in our lives good & bad, we were laughing together & didn't bring up the past for once. It felt so natural I was actually surprised. We always said that we would be close and in each other lives even if we're just friends but I'm wondering if that would be possible since we have hurt each other so much in the past & my love for him is still strong. Is it possible to make a friendship out of this situation?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The relationship was on & off because we have both equally hurt each other in some way in the past but would always find a way to make up. THIS IS A COMMON SCENARIO FOR COUPLES WHO BREAK UP.

    But it wasn't always bad we shared plenty of good times also. EVERY COUPLE THAT BREAKS UP SAYS THIS.

    Until one day I finally contacted him. THIS WAS A MISTAKE.

    While we were together we talked about all the new things going on in our lives good & bad, we were laughing together & didn't bring up the past for once. IT'S EASY TO STAY ON YOUR BEST BEHAVIOR FOR A BRIEF TIME.

    Is it possible to make a friendship out of this situation? GOOD FRIENDS DO NOT SEE EACH OTHER IN ROMANTIC OR SEXUAL WAYS. YOU WILL ALWAYS HAVE SOME HOPE FOR RECONCILIATION. CAN YOU LISTEN TO HIM TALK FOR HOURS ABOUT ANOTHER GIRL HE IS DATING, HOW SHE IS EVERYTHING HE WANTS, HOW SHE PLEASES HIM SEXUALLY? PROBABLY NOT. EVENTUALLY, JEALOUSY WILL INTERFERE WITH ANY ATTEMPT AT FRIENDSHIP. YOU NEED TO MAINTAIN YOUR DISTANCE OR YOU WILL PROBABLY NOT MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think you could try to be friends but I don't see it working for very long if you still have strong feelings for him. Honestly, it just sounds like an emotional roller coaster waiting to happen. I personally wouldn't want to put myself in that situation. You broke up for a reason, continuing to be so involved in each others' lives and attempting a friendship will only make it more difficult to move on.

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What Guys Said 4

  • "friendship" no way.
    Sorry but I say this over and over, straight men and women are NOT friends.
    esp in this situation.
    I told this one woman I broke up with who wanted to be "friends", I don't want to be friends with her, I want a relationship with her. I always will. So if it doesn't work out, there is no reason for me to be friends with her. I would get nothing from it.
    If you want to be "friends" and maybe that leads back to a relationship, then sure it is possible.
    I was with my ex wife 25 years. she wanted the divorce, not me. after a year of her treating me like complete shit for who knows why, things changed. I also have taken the "radical acceptance" route in that I know I cannot change the situation. So pining for her and creating an issue every time I see her and making things tense does nothing. Since both of us changed our approach we get along great.
    I could see myself in a position to be much better friends. but I will always hope that one day we end up back together, not because I want to be friends.
    And she is still with the piece of shit she cheated on me with, so I will never be in her company with that garbage around.

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  • I am in that situation...

    It is really difficult... because you have to cary on.

    Like wen chat with her i always think of what we used to do.

    Memories we made...
    And the Love we used to share...
    And what could have been.

    So difficult but achievable...

    If you really want to still have im n your life?
    And if he is worth it...

    Then ya stay friends...

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  • no... not if you still have feelings. give it time and move on. then maybe...

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  • This same exact thing just happened to me a couple days ago, I am not emotionally strong enough to be just friends, I still want to be with her, and I'm working on it , but it's honestly just What You're comfortable with

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What Girls Said 4

  • Yes, it's possible to still be friends. I would suggest however since it has only been a month and you are so emotional about him, that you give it some time first. It's hard and can also be really unhealthy to be friends with someone that your in love with because when they find a partner it can be really upsetting for you. If you truly care for him and want to be friends, you will get to a point where you want him to be happy even if he is not with you.

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  • I could never be friends with an ex... especially if we've been intimate. To me, it's like going backwards. The only one I can ever be friends with is my ex, who is also the father of my kids. Otherwise, it would be just too painful, the memories, and if they ever get into a new relationship. Salt in the wounds.

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  • Is it possible to be just friends with an ex that you're still in love with?
    I couldn't do it.

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  • No you will always feel the need between your legs if the sex was good

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    • I agree with you and sex plays important role of you start comparing the satisfaction that we get from ex. Tortelina I agree so practical answer

    • @Askkenny Thanks it's like an ache between your legs and a memory of many sex acts with the guy

    • On my show askkenny they were asked to vote secretly that if they think of some while having sex to get the end result. Surprisingly some said they think of sexy moments they had and some voted for sexy scene of movie or celebrity too 😜💯👏🏻👏🏻

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