Okay so I was with this guy and basically it was a "almost relationship." He was an ass sometimes and everyone including myself knew I deserved better (long story) and so I started to slowly reply with short answers, and then started to ignore him altogether because I couldn't deal with it. I would answer his phone calls just to make sure he was okay, but it was usually 3 am asking me to come over (which I of course always denied) then he'd call again and I wouldn't answer. I took him off as following on my social media and no longer follow him. He said sorry for some things but not the real reason he hurt me. So I've been seeing other people, and everything, so why am I still not over him? I thought the number 1 way to get over someone was to go out with different people. And I have with 3 other guys. Yet I'm still wanting to text him and everything! I know he's not gonna change, and know it wouldn't be the smartest decision. But I still wanna see him. Is it because I'm the one that ended it and that if I really wanted to I could see him? The other night I was drunk and texted him "hey" and he replied within seconds with a "hey" back and realizing what I did I didn't reply. So it is because he doesn't hate me that I still miss him? If he told me "I hate you and never wanna see you again" I would get over him. I NEED HELP ON WHAT TO DO. Thank you! & yes I know some of my actions don't make sense, but that's not the point of this question. What's been done, has been done.
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It's normal to think of past lovers especially if you really connected with them. It doesn't matter how it ended. Some people can break up with you and you'll still miss them. I doubt you being the one who ended it is what is causing you to miss him. You're likely missing him simply due to feelings and it takes a lot of time to get over it. You cannot force anything. I just know that often when we miss a ex it's us missing the IDEA of them and not the actual person as they are. We get caught up in a fantasy perfect world and think they are amazing when in reality they hurt us many times when we were together and it likely wasn't so perfect.2