Are chances to get your ex back higher when ignoring them?

He broke up with me 9 months ago (it's been awhile, I know) because he didn't want a commitment. We were together for 4 years in a long distance relationship. He wanted to stay friends and I kind of agreed but regretted because he would call me only when it suits him. I think by staying friends with him made him get over me even faster, I should've disappeared and make him miss me. He never had a chance to miss me because I was always available. I'm just so bad at ignoring, it's not something that I do to someone I know for so long and loved them. I feel like ignoring is really rude and like he didn't do anything THAT bad to be ignored, he never ignored me. But he did rejected to hang out many time. I figured that it's the only thing that will make to either get over him or get him back. The last time we talked I asked him if he wants to watch a game together and he said he wants to watch it alone. It pretty much hurt me because we always watched it together. So that's when I realized I should ignore him, and today he wrote me on Skype asking me what I'm doing and if I watched a new episode of this one tv show that we both like. What should I do? I hate to say this but I do want him back. I don't want nothing less, I want him to commit to me. P. S. He hasn't been with anyone since we broke up and neither have I.


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What Guys Said 1

  • This sounds pathetic. You spent 4 years of your life in a long distance relationship that was not satisfying for you, you broke up, and now you want to do it again. Did I miss anything?

    Do you want to know how he feels about you without asking him? It's easy. Just look at the way he is treating you. It doesn't sound like he has any love for you in his heart.

    You need to get over him and move forward with your life.

    • Yes you did miss. I didn't broke it off he did. It was satisfying for me I had no problems with it. He is not treating me bad, he is just not treating me enough. He treated me amazingly throughout our whole relationship, the breakup came out of the blue. Yes I want to do it again because I'm moving there in few months and this time it wouldn't be a long distance relationship.

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    • Yeah I do. I want to be treated with commitment... but by him. I'm not ditching other guys either, it's not like I'm waiting for him, hell no! But there's still no one. I'm just saying that I want what I want, either from him or from someone else. And I want him to understand that. I don't want to be just a friend who he's gonna call whenever he's bored. I told him this but he didn't change, he was still calling me whenever he wanted. That's why I think I should just ignore him for him to understand. It's just hard for me because I never ignored anyone in my life, I always say clear what I want and I was lucky enough that people understood me and they either changed or stopped calling me. I have a feeling that he's gonna think that I'm mad at him or that I hate him.

    • Tell him why you intend to ignore him before you do it. But I don't think you should expect any change from him and that, ultimately, he will not be The One for you.

What Girls Said 1

  • Old flames always seemed to want to come back into my life only after I had become happy again and moved on, and my life was going really well without them. By then, I had no use for them, and was ready to create happier memories with someone new.


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