What does an ex have to do to get you back?

When someone breaks up with you that you loved and were together awhile... typically how long do you hold the torch for? And have you ever gone cold/refused to meet up even though you still had feelings for them? What would it take for you to want to see them again?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • She would have to beg for me and drop on both fukking knees crying for me back. She would have to tell me why. She would have to prove to me she is no longer a cheating slut and will never do that shit again! & even then i dont think i could trust her

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    • Oh my... well what if the girl or guy never cheated? Just miscommunication and taking each other for granted? Would the girl still have to beg?

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    • ahah ok... so how would a girl know if she had another shot with her ex when he is refusing to meet up and barely text? But confirms he's not seeing anyone and sometimes flirty banter.

    • If he even responds then he is willing! IN PERSON is the only way to do this. If you are REAL about it.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Typically if she broke up with me, I'm done and out immediately and I make no effort to reconnect even if I still had feelings. The only way I would get back together was if I thought the relationship was working before the break and she was able to convince me that she had figured out what she wanted and would be able to progress in the relationship. But given that I don't connect and actually stay away from my ex, the chances of that are slim, very slim.

    If it was something I did wrong that caused her to break up with me, I'd be looking at a real ling long time before I'd think of getting back together, like 1+ year.

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    • Thanks for the reply @longjohndan... so are you saying you would consider going back if it was something on her end she needed to change? Possibly more compromise/understanding on her part?

    • I always think of relationships like this needing a reset, the ability to step away get some clarity on both sides and then be able to come back together without any of the luggage from before, just knowledge. That is a really really high bar to get over, not impossible, just very challenging. Generally, I find when people are far enough to say they are reset, a lot of times they don't feel compelled to get back together. But yeah, if I had that separation, and it seemed like things were on track for her, it's possible I guess. You sound kind of regretful in a way, I'm not sure if that's right, but that's not always a healthy mindset to get back into a relationship.

  • Depends on how the break up went. One ex broke up with me twice. She was civil and apologetic both times. We had amazing chemistry. I would take her back but we must discuss some changes. It would not take much.

    The other ex burned that bridge then nuked the site several times over. Not a single apology after everything she did and said. Its super unlikely for me to reconnect with her again. Even if I did my friends and family won't welcome her.

    Both these women need to grow up and change. I do too.

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