Should I contact the father of my child?

Hey,

I'm 25, and five months pregnant now. I was in a relationship for a year with a guy who seemed decent but who turned out to be a selfish creep. When I got pregnant he didn't want the baby at all and treated me awfully about it..pushing for abortion and treating me like I was nothing all of a sudden. It t was obvious he was just using me. He thought he couldn't have kids...well that's what he told me...ladies never believe that btw! Ever!

Anyway I found the break up so hard, being pregnant, on my own...seeing my stomach grow..I cried myself to sleep most nights..

But now I feel stronger..I'm trying to get everything in place so I can give the baby the best start ..

Haven't heard from my ex in months..he just doesn't care..he said he wants me to ring him after the baby is born (the day it's born) but I really don't see why I should...I know he's the father ...but what kind of father...he wanted the baby aborted for god's sake...

I know I'm gonna get people defending him and saying of course you have to tell him ..but I have been through a lot and he got to walk away and get on with his life as normal...

Just like to know what girls especially would do if you were in my situation.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • -Couples should agree on what to do if contraception fails before having sex.

    Lots of bad communication here.

    You're angry at him about the abortion demand. You could have known that by talking about the subject beforehand. He might have feel trapped into marriage.

    -If he's convinced (rightly or wrongly) he's sterile, he will suspect (rightly or wrongly) that there was another guy somewhere.

    -Legally, the kid is entitled to alimony from the father, so his demand might cost him a lot of $.

    -It may also be a way to get you back. (did he walk out on you or did you dump him?)

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    • I dumped him.

      Sorry but your answer seems favourable to him cos your a man...

      There was no other guy at all!

      Of course I'm angry about abortion demand...and his total selfishness ...he didn't give a crap about me either in all this..just himself.

      And he thought he was sterile..was convinced of it....but I should have been more careful still ..i'm not blaming him for getting me pregnant..just his cowardy reaction...we were in a commited relationship after all . Or so I thought.

    • Well, if he's that kind of selfish person you may be better off without him.

      Remember to ask alimony for the kid.

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 4

  • No do not tell him trust me you will regret it. I was in that situation about two years ago. I was pregnant with our third child and had found out mutha f***er was cheating on me. I of course flipped out and we broke up and guess what at court three weeks later he brings a girl...I did my best to co-parent with the kids I already had with him but that was pure drama all he cared about was that girl and he ended up causing my kids so much hurt and me as well. He got her pregnant right after I delivered my son and when my baby was in the hospital needing surgery he NEVER came. I tried to be the bigger person and involve him but it was too painful ...what I'm saying is I regret the day I even met him but I really regret trying to involve him. This guy who got you pregnant has already shown you what type of guy he is and will be. WORD OF ADVICE MAKE SURE you go after his ass for child support. DONT CONTACT HIM YOU WILL JUST END UP HURT. FRIEND ME IF YOU WANT

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  • I wouldn't contact him.

    Like you said, he wanted the child aborted.

    If he has any interest in knowing about his child, he'll contact you.

    Don't let him bring you down

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  • lol did we date the same guy? ? lol

    anywho, make sure that when he signs the right of parentage that he kknows he'll bepaying child support then go to court get all of his rights taken away and he'll stilll pay child support but technically he won't have any visitation rights because he abndoned you while you were preggers

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  • I think you should tell him. Atleast try to tell him. If he still doesn't want anything to do with the baby. I say f*** him. You did your part. He is the one being a douche. (:

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