Do you agree that divorcing or dumping a SO is the only solution if one partner has a higher sex drive & the other partner has little to 0 drive?

do you agree that divorcing or dumping a SO is the only solution if one partner has a higher sex drive than the other partner has little to 0 sex drive?

I'm not talking about one partner having less sex drive that's a little, I'm not talking about a little less I mean one partner having almost a non existent sex drive, they want to have sex but once a week or 4 times a month

Updates:
This question is not about me. I'm single and I'm not sexually active.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think that sex is a way for two people to connect... if you are married or attached, sex, contrary to popular opinion, is not just about the guy and him getting his rocks off and the sensual feelings that go with it. Sex is a very important way for a guy to connect with his partner... you'll find that after sex, a guy opens up, is more vulnerable and honest... which is why, if a guy is more promiscuous, he is wanting to get out of there after the deed, as he is wanting to escape from a pending commitment...
    So, the fact that there is no sex occurring, would indicate that the couple are not connecting, communication is low and the couple have fallen into a routine which neither know how to fix or freshen up. Therefore, is divorce the only option? I would say, no, but for the relationship to work, pride will have to be swallowed on both parts, and an understanding that in order for the spark to be injected back into the relationship, sometimes we have to face a bit of confrontation. A spark is created by friction, which can be unpleasant initially, but in the end, you'll be cooking!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I do not agree that divorcing or dumping SO is the only solution if one partner has no sex drive. I would say it's the easy (and perhaps selfish!) way tho...
    Often lack of sex drive is due to a underlying physiological or psychological condition. So perhaps communication and compassion would be a solution, if they care and love their partner? Trying to talk and figure our what is actually going on? People can change one way (more sex drive) or the other (less sex drive) in time... nothing is set in stone!

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 13

  • Its certainly to be considered. My question is what changed? Were they always this way?

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    • I don't know I'm just asking I'm single

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    • The question is not about me

    • I understand I'm just giving a general opinion to your question

  • As someone with a much higher sex drive than my SO, I think it would be a big mistake if that's the only problem in the relationship. I'm not gonna say it's not frustrating at times (for both of us, mind you), but there is so much else going with us that I can't think about ending it based on that. I recently got her to agree to cuddle when I'm in the mood but she isn't and it's helped a ton -- see if that is something you'd be willing to try.

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    • The question is not about me. I'm single and I'm not sexually active.

    • Yeah, I saw that right after I posted. Sorry about that :3

  • Sexual compatibility is key to a long lasting relationship. If the couple is not compatible, then it's bound to fail either through divorce or infidelity

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  • No if two people legitimately love each other sacrifices and compromises will be made. Love is so much more then sex.

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  • Only if neither are willing to make their marriage an open one.

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  • i probably would let her go.

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  • Yes, unless there are other moral factors, children, disability, etc.

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  • @idkwtftoputhere u better step up yo game or.. πŸ‘ΏπŸ˜‘πŸ‘ΏπŸ˜‘

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  • Sex and intimacy are two make or breakers in the relationship and/or marriage. It's not 1950. You don't stay with that person without cheating which eventually divorce is imminent. I have been on both ends. I've cheated abc been cheated on. I don't care how much money the guy makes how hung he is hoe good lookin. If he's not rockin her world as far as sex. Somebody else will. I fleet with more married women than single. They round all sat the same. He's lazy. Gets off too quick. Etc. I WOULF feel that gap over and over and over. Do your homework guys. If you don't I'm very Very good at tutoring

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  • Heh. That's not nonexistant for many couples.

    Other options besides breaking up include:
    investing in sex toys
    sex (perhaps with sex toys) even when one partner's not interested in sex - for the intimacy if nothing else. The other partner can return the favour with back rubs ;)
    opening up the relationship - finding sex outside it in a safe, consensual way can work for many people.
    I'm sure there are more! Good luck!

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  • "This question is not about me. I'm single and I'm not sexually active. "
    Then it's about an amputee who lost hands?

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  • Once a week! If there's no treatment for her I will divorce her

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  • That's what I did. Nothing worse than waking up with a bone every day and nowhere to bury it. Then again it's usually guys needing more sex and getting let down by the missus. I've never knocked sex back in my life. If a girl wants to sleep with me I'm happy to oblige. Never understood guys who held back to prove a point. If your pissed off with your girlfriend and she offers it then show her who's boss in bed. You'll both love it. We're made that way. Well, most of us are anyway

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What Girls Said 7

  • I can't get beyond that you keep responding to most comments with the preface of you're single, sexually inactive, and the question isn't about you. And that's frustrating because i really want to comment on this question. We all gathered that info from the update. And besides, people are just giving you their general opinion regardless of the back story of the question. Rant over.

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    • Well that was rude and uncalled for.

    • Not everyone has seen the update. So you can not speak for all people. It's funny how users like you start drama for no reason at all.

    • I do not care that you are frustrated you seem childish anyways

  • Not really. Open relationships are a thing, if there's the understanding that you have vastly different libidos.

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  • Well, if I was unhappy then yes. Sex is a big part of a relationship for me and I want to be desired and desire somebody and act upon it. So yes I would consider it if I tried to fix it. However for some there are other options, like open relationships and what not. But sex is important to me.

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  • I think it's grounds for divorce, after all its incompatibility. Intimacy is important so it's okay to want it returned to you.

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    • I'm not sexually active and I'm not in a relationship

  • no, not at all but most normal people iron those issues out real early stages of dating.. tal some more or go fuck someone else

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  • Once a week isn't non existent. I'm with a low libido partner and he only wants it once every few months. But yeah mismatched libido is a horrible thing.

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  • Getting to the root of the problem may solve things. A very low sex drive in a young to middle aged healthy person with a balanced attitude towards sex isn't typical. There tends to be a physical (including meds) or psychological reason that can often be worked on.

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    • I wouldn't know I have never experienced being middle aged. I'm 22

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    • I'm not sexually active and I'm not in a relationship

    • Well, my answer is still that there is usually something that can be done about it.

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