"Bye, love you" from an ex boyfriend?

I am aware that this kind of question has been asked million times by a lot of people but I am still puzzled now.

Since this summer my ex boyfriend started contacting me again 2 years after the breakup via Skype chat. I was so surprised but we just write to each other really normal bur cordial. But since 2 weeks ago he started saying that he remembers how beautiful I am to him or something similar like that.
Last week we were also chatting and before he went offline he wrote me "bye love you" which made me a heart attack.

Then I asked him what he means and he would answer me "that's completely normal. Can't someone say that?"

For me personally, "love" is a strong word and cannot be used or taken lightly. I explained also to him that I wouldn't use that word unless I really mean it. However he remains silent; no answer.

I know this is just a little ridiculous thing but I am so shocked how he thinks that saying something like that is "normal".

Can anybody relate to what he thinks/says? I would love to get an idea what's going on in his head.

Thank you so much.


Most Helpful Guy

  • There are different types of love. He could have meant that he loves you because you left an imprint on his heart and his life, and always will, not that he's in love with you.

    Or maybe it was a hail mary to get back together and see how you responded. When you didn't respond in a way that he perceived to mean that you'd be open to getting back together, he backed off.

    • Thank you so much for your answer. He currently lives abroad and he told me he's planning to come to visit the country where I live. However after this awkward situation he probably won't talk to me anymore, which is kind of sad because I never meant to "decline" him. I just thought that using the word "love" to an ex partner (now friend) is not too right.. I hope I did not do anythinh wrong..

    • Well, I'm not sure what you want out of this. Do you want to be friends and you just want to define boundaries? Or are you interested in getting back together (I'm guessing no on that since he lives in another country). If you care enough to be friends then I'd just send him a message saying "I'm sorry about the way I reacted before - you just caught me off guard. But I'd love to catch up when you're here." I think he probably feels like the asshole here more than you do.

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What Guys Said 1

  • he's trying to ease his way back in there via psychological ploys and memory association. he's faking it till it becomes true.

    • Thank you! But is this kind of thing familiar, that an ex boyfriend would write "love you" at the end of conversation... Despite the fact that we are just "friends"?

    • its not unheard of. i employed a similar tactic with an ex. no dice tho

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