I broke up with my boyfriend almost 2 months ago. We got into a fight. He said some hurtful stuff. I was really upset. so i ended it. we where living together. Also we have dated before, broke up then deiced to get back together in July. Most of the time we where good together. But we had been fighting a lot. i miss him a lot and have been thinking about how we could make the relationship better if we tried again. Im 25, he'll be 25 next month. I dont have a lot of experience dating. So I've also been tiring to work on myself.
So my question is. IS it worth it to try to get my ex back?
Most Helpful Guy
I'm not very experienced in relationships personally, but I do have knowledge on a few things that people tend to not know.
One thing is - how much time have you lasted together in a relationship, and how much time of that collectively, have you spent time together, physically? Spending too much time together can be just as bad as spending too little time together. Spending too much time can lead to a break-down in communication, knowing everything, such as, how their day (at work or otherwise) has been; how is their family members; how are their friends, etc... Everyday questions, things like that.
Another is - Love can be broken into 4 words (Security, Honesty, Respect, and Trust), if you don't have one you don't have any, therefore, there's no relationship - how could you love someone who you DON'T feel secure, you can't trust, who doesn't respect you, or someone who is dishonest to you?
I had gone back a third time with an "ex," thinking 3rd time lucky, unfortunately it wasn't lucky, but I did find out that she was using me, so that WAS lucky.
As Byron said, weigh up the "pros" & "cons," as I do when getting a new car. These pros and cons need to be to your (dis-) liking. Weigh every aspect you can think of to mark him on, both physically and on his personality.
As I've said earlier, spending too much time together physically can cause problems in relationships, and I have seen plenty of relationships end due to this.
I also think the subject of the arguments needs to be talked about by the pair of you in a civilized manner if you were serious about trying again. People say evil things in the heat of the moment, yet it wasn't meant. Even I have said things in the heat of the moment to my parents, but it's the sort of thing to let thing calm down (taking as much time as needed), before the issue can then be raised and spoken about in a calm and civilized manner, like adults.
So, the ultimate question. Is it worth getting back with an ex? By heeding my advice as above, only you can truly answer that question yourself, my love. It's everybody's $64,000 question. If you find you can't get on in a relationship, perhaps you should think possibly that you could only work well as friends, and that is if you still want him in your life. In this situation, I would personally think that friendship may be the only way. There is a girl that I like, unfortunately, she's seeing my cousin, so in my case, friendship IS my ONLY option for NOW.0
Most Helpful Girl
were you fighting because of PMS? i am dealing with that. i used to break up with him because of my PMS... then he couldn't stand it.. and ended it with me this time... i to am wondering if i should get back... i am giving him some space.. its only been a week. we were very loving before the PMS fight.
the other times you two broke up, how long was it break and who broke up? who made up?1
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