Why is losing him getting harder every day?

My ex of what would have been a year broke up with me just under a month ago now. It's killing me on the inside. I'm 21 and this was my first boyfriend. He meant the world to me. I was always bullied and traumatized growing up and he knew how broken I was and how long it took me to really open up to him. He was always caring and promised me he'd never hurt me like they did. He talked about getting married and all our friends thought we would. I did so much for him with little In return I felt like I owed it to him for helping to fix me. I bought him so many gifts and was alwYs there when he was sick. He rarely bought me a gift but would hold me when I cried. I don't know where I went so wrong or what I did so wrong. My one "friend" told me maybe at the bar I should have went out and danced and not stayed away from everyone. But I only did that because I was shy and bullied so much in the past and told I couldn't dance that I get so self conscious. Well he hurt me. and it hurts a lot more then anything I've ever went through. He broke promises and my trust for ever thinking another guy could love me. My friends all tell me it'll get easier every day. But it's not. It's getting harder and I feel more and more alone. I've never really had many friends and even in my college classes I feel like I'm that filter friend where no one wants to really hang out with me but I'm just there kinda. It hurts so much. I don't know what I did so wrong. The worst part is a day after he broke up with me he was onto another girl and it's been 3 weeks and no guy really even gives me a second look. How will I seriously ever find love if everyone just hurts me :'( I'm so broken I can't even fix myself. Why is it just getting harder every day
he still wants to be friends with me which is fine I don't wanna lose him completely. But he never asks me to hang out really anymore either
what did I do so wrong. I tried so hard to make him happy :(


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Most Helpful Girl

  • A broken heart is so painful and at the moment your pain is still raw. Your heart is broken, but you still love him with all of the little pieces. There is no time limit or remedy for a broken heart. Time doesn't heal the pain... It is what you do with your time which heals the pain. Try to spend time with friends, keep active, and your mind focused on things other than him. Try something new😊

    Gradually , the pain will ease and one day you will think about the times you shared together , and smile... instead of feeling overwhelmed by the pain, and breaking down in tears.

    Sometimes you just have to accept that some people can stay in your heart but not in your life. Your heart is stronger than you imagine. It can broken, played, or cheated but it does heal and can love again.

    Love doesn't come with a guarante, so you did nothing wrong. The love he had was probably real , but sometimes people change , their feelings change and over time two people grow apart.

    Sometimes you don't realise how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have. Some people never get over some who they have loved and lost... time just helps them to survive without them , and helps them to learn to live with the pain.
    Good luck xx πŸ’šπŸ˜Š

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  • Im sorry to hear what your going through. I know how it feels to have gone through a tough breakup... it feels like nothing will ever get better ever again and you just want to dig yourself in a hole until you can finally breath and move on. I was like that too and we have a few other things in common as well. Around January, my heart broke to pieces when my boyfriend broke up with me via text and I couldnt even get out of bed some days. I remember thinking about him every single day the minute i woke up til the second i closed my eyes to sleep. I would even wake up with him instantly on my mind and wish i could just fall back asleep where i didn't have to constantly think about him. First relationships are hard! You think you can never ever be with anyone else bc you've never really experienced anything else. But trust me... he isn't the only guy out there. Someone out there is a perfect match for you. Now you know its not him but someone even better. Keep your head up girl!πŸ€—πŸ€—

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  • honey, i know how you feeling now. because i am through the same thing, my ex made me trust he would marry me, but after he got everything, he just told me i wasn't right for him. it is hard for me , but i am getting better. you are so young, if i was at your age, i wouldn't even give him a thought. you have so much time to meet other guys, much better than him. compared to my situation, yours is nothing. trust me. now what you need to do is to ignore him, tell him you won't be his friend. secondly improve yourseslf, focus on your study , make more friends, join some clubs and have more hobbies. the last is the most important, make yourself beautiful, more beautiful than before, you will be more confident, start laughing loudly, be happy guys will be attracteed to you! trust me, one day, you will find him nobody!! cheer up!!

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