Is it too late?

My ex and I broke up 10 months ago, we were together for 4 years in a long distance. It was kind of mutual, but he started it. He lost desire to travel and he didn't want to be in a relationship anymore, he wanted to be alone. He said he didn't dismiss the idea of getting back together one day, but while we are still in distance he doesn't see it happening right now, that he wants to finish his studies and focus on that. Well I didn't object much, I accepted it, maitining a distance rel. was hard for both of us. I still want to move where he is because I am hunting for one job there, my dream job, and I had to sort and finish things here first so I could move there. It was too soon to tell if I'm ever gonna move there 10 months ago, but now I got the job and will be moving there in February. My ex and I kept in touch all this time. Nothing too much but from time to time, there's really no bad blood between us. He will soon be finishing his studies. He hasn't been with anyone since the breakup. He could've but he stood behind his words that he doesn't want a relationship, with anyone. I haven't been with anyone either. Do you think there is no possibility in us ever getting back together when I move there? Is he done with me forever? Is a year too long apart to rekindle things? I don't want to talk about this with him because we talked about it 6 months ago and his answer was always "I don't know now" so I dropped it, giving that he's the one who ended it and he's the one who should initiate if he wants to. I mean I'm fine either way, I spent enough time healing, it's not like I'm waiting for him, I just haven't met anyone yet and I'm not even in the rush since I'll be moving soon. I'm very excited about this job. But it does makes me sad knowing that we spent 4 years trying to make me move there, dreaming, talking about future, and now when it's actually happening we're not together. I love him, I know that much. And I know that if he wanted us back, my feelings could awake again. I secretly hope that we do get back together.


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  • You can't put too much weight on getting him back. He did break it off. You could let him know once you move there and see what his reaction is but don't push him into a date. Let him take the lead. I wish you well but in my world, once it's over, it's time for me to focus energy elsewhere.


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