Is it normal to feel less social after a break up?

I still want to see my friends and go out. But I used to enjoy mixers and events for singles. Now I'm scared about going because my ex who I just broke up with a month ago and met there was a manipulative psychopath who tore apart my soul. I'm starting therapy but I am still feeling vulnerable and scared that I'll just find another partner who is unhealthy.

Updates:
I also am not the most extroverted person so while I enjoy being social sometimes, and I do enjoy single events when I want to meet guys, it does take more effort and energy for me, my natural calm state is smaller scale socializing and alone time. I guess my soul is just telling me to heal?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes... Just go out and have a good time but stay away from guys at the moment, or at least having a relationship or a sexual relationship.. Give yourself time to get used to the idea of pursuing someone else but don't rush into anything.. You need time to heal.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You're at a very fragile state.
    The break up was a huge blow to you... you need time to heal.
    Eventually you will get back to yourself.
    You have to give yourself time.
    Although once month seems like a long time... that's still pretty recent.

    "I am still feeling vulnerable and scared that I'll find just another partner who is unhealthy".

    It's possible people enter into bad relationship after bad relationship.
    But since you have more experience (because of what you've been through), you can use that as a tool to recognize things.
    If you see those same negative qualities that you didn't like in your previous relationship, then you can use that as a red flag (to alert you).
    You can get out of that relationship.

    Every experience we have can better equip us for the future.

    You can't control who you encounter.
    You can control how you handle the situation (whether you allow those experiences to continue or not).

    *Hugs*
    You'll be alright.

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • I've dated a guy who's the same, and you need to take time to yourself to heal, and retreat from social situations if that's what you need. Don't think about what others may expect or want form you, you need to heal yourself in a healthy way, and take your time. You've made a good start.

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