LDR: It's too hard for me to move on? help me please?

So me and ex boyfriend dated for about 5 months and it was an Online LDR. I thought we would break up and I wouldn't fall in love with him, but turns out I did... He has a girlfriend now and we broke up 2 months ago.. We've done the no contact thing and we ended up missing one another. For a week, we've been skyping almost everyday but we don't constantly text which is good... Yesterday, he finally admitted that he's dating that girl which i'm not surprised by the way. So I asked him why don't you just Skype her every night? and he didn't answer but told me to shut up don't mention her. I asked why? and he said because it ruins the moment we have together. I was like okay.. wtf. I told him that he shouldn't Skype me from now on... because he tells me he loves me and it's just cheating. I asked him if he would like it if his new girlfriend did that to him and he said no. It hurt when he said that.. I just couldn't take it anymore.. So i told him, we can't talk anymore and he said is this really what you want? you want me to leave? and i said i think you should leave. Then he was like no don't say should. Tell me what you want. I told him I don't want you to leave, but you can't do this anymore; it's cheating. Then he was like so you're telling me to go? I told him yes.
I don't know what to do.. it's been 2 months and if anything, I love him more than anything... I don't know if he feels the same way but he told me he does love me or why else would he Skype me every night. I asked him is it the same way as before? he said I don't know. It feels different but yeah I love you.

I know i made the right decision... but at the same time.. I don't want to lose what we had and at the same time... I'm smart to know that i deserve better.. but what we had was special... he's my first love and i've never felt so much for someone before.. I just don't know what to do.. should I just stay by his side as friends and see where it takes me or let it go and never look back again..&nbs
  • Stay friends if he means so much to you
    Vote A
  • Move on and let him go
    Vote B
  • I don't know
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Guy

  • I never understood why girls are so motivated to "stay friends". This is the most stupid shit theris. It just increases suffering for at least one partner. It's like giving a child a present and let it stay infront of them while the child being unable to open it by any means.

    Thus try to move on. It seems like he did already.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I definitely think you should move on from him, as hard as that may be. I was also in an online LDR for almost 5 months and was completely in love with the guy, I still am. I never thought we would last but I fell in love with him so quickly and honestly it was so wonderful. Then out of the blue a couple of days ago, he ended things with me. I never saw it coming because things were going so well and we had started planning me moving in with him. He broke it off and completely cut me out of his life. I got a message from him a little while ago asking if I still wanted to be with him. I told him yes and we haven't spoken since. That hurt because it gave me hope that he wanted to get back together when really I think he just asked to boost him ego. The problem with LDR that a lot of people don't get, is that they are incredibly difficult to move on from because you take a chance on something that you have no idea if it'll last, as the distance will cause some initial problems with the relationship because being apart from someone whilst getting to know them and whilst falling in love with them is hard, but you make things work regardless.
    The fact that your ex has a girlfriend now must suck, I think that if he really wanted to be with you he wouldn't be with her. It's hard to stay friends with someone who you have such strong feelings for, so I think it would be best to just try and move on. That's not to say that in the future the two of you can't be friends, but I think you deserve the chance to move on from him before you let him into your life again otherwise it'll just cause hurt for you.

    • yeahh it really took me a while to realize this but yeah.. I broke it off recently.. I just couldn't take it anymore.. like he doesn't deserve me. He doesn't even want me to move on.. like wtf.. if he can't even imagine me dating someone else, how can we even make it work.. So i decided to break it off.. We've never really gone more than 2 weeks without talking so maybe he just needs to realize what he lost.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Believe me when I say I know how attached you are to him and how hard it must be to let go. But I think if you love him you'll let him go. Soon enough I bet you'll find somebody else to. Good luck and sorry.


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